Pieces of Him
by pinkdogsarehappy1
Summary: Edward is devastated when Angela breaks up with him. The one girl who knew everything. Player Eddie has returned. Will Bella be able to see past his games, break his defenses and pick up the pieces he unknowingly left behind? AU/AH
1. Sweetheart Like You

**Chapter One: Sweetheart Like You**

******Disclaimer:** I don't own Twilight. Not one bit. I just get to play with the characters. (which I think is still a pretty big WIN :)

**(p.s. Change to 1/2 view! It makes the experience so much nicer :))**

* * *

For a second, sadness filled her eyes and her light-hearted laughter weakened, but the look went as soon as it had come. She looked up at me with a smile, and it was hard to tell if I hadn't just imagined it.

I always wondered why she never said anything about these…incidents. They had happened more than once. Nothing ever serious, just a slip when I'd actually believed I had reformed. I couldn't stop replaying the scene from today in my head.

She had left for a moment to get a jacket and I had been in the courtyard waiting, until Laurie or Lauren or _something_ had come up to me. She would not stop pestering me with questions.

"Well, if you ever want to be with someone…else," she had said slyly, before she took a step forward and looked behind me. Her eyes were suddenly gleaming with malice as she purred, "You know who to call."

"I'll make sure to."

My voice dipped low, and I realized with a start just how close our faces were and the proximity between our bodies. _What the hell?_ I didn't like her at all, and I was completely giving her the wrong impression. She smirked as she walked away, looking satisfied...

"Edward?" I had heard from behind me.

_Shit_. I turned around slowly, willing for her not to have seen or heard what had just happened, but of course Angela had been there, and her eyes were wide with hurt.

I was the cause of her pain. I always was the cause. And I hated it. I _hated_ hurting Angela. Not just because she was my girlfriend, but also because she was my _best_ friend. She knew how I hurt, and what was more rare, _why_ I hurt. I had hurt her thoughtlessly so many times, and even armed with countless pieces of information that could destroy me, she had never done anything to hurt me back.

"I'm ready to go," was all she had said—all she would ever say about instances like this, but I could still hear the crack in her sweet voice.

We had walked to my silver Volvo in silence. And now we were here, eating lunch and making small talk, and she was smiling at me like nothing had happened.

I made the decision right then to make up for all my past digressions. I would take her to that exclusive restaurant that only the privileged few could rave about. I would take her to that silly movie she was talking about right now and I would shower her in the affection she deserved—I would make her feel loved.

"Love."

She looked surprised, and I realized I had spoken. She gave me a small smile.

"That's a pretty apt description of how I feel about you."

I wanted to tell her I felt the same, that I still felt the way I had when I first said those three significant words to her.

Angela had just come back from her job at Barnes and Noble right after I had gotten a disturbing call that brought me back to a place I didn't want to remember. She had come up to my room, and saw me with one hand in my hair, while the other was engaged in a death grip around my cell phone.

"Oh, honey, what happened? Did they call again?"

Even so many months after the fact, even if it had been by accident, I still felt so relieved that she knew everything.

"Yes, they"—my eyes narrowed, even just thinking of them—"called.

"What did they want now?" There was a little bit of annoyance in her voice that was hardly ever there.

I told her. She listened to everything I was willing to tell, knowing that asking questions could shut me down faster than anything. She looked me in the eyes to let me know she was listening and only spoke to offer suggestions when I just couldn't think of the right word. After everything was said, she came over to the bed where I was sitting and just gave me a firm, caring hug. In a voice full of the confidence most people weren't aware she possessed, she said:

"It'll be all right. I know it."

She meant it, and it so was. With her, things could be that simple. I leaned into her hug and realized I had never felt more comforted or loved.

"I love… you." I could only mumble it quietly; the words felt too foreign on my tongue.

She pulled her head back, eyes wide. "What?"

"I love you."

I said it clearer and louder this time. I could feel the truth pounding in each word. Before Angela, I had never felt that unconditional trust in anyone, not even with my family. With her, I never felt insecure; I never felt like I was unwanted—I felt like I belonged there, talking with her, sharing secrets with her, and just being held in her arms.

She put her head back on my shoulder and replied, "I love you, too," in a perfectly content voice.

We had sat there for a while on my bed in a comfortable silence and fell asleep side-by-side. In the morning, I could still feel her caring embrace.

I would not allow myself to lose that. In the words of a cheesy song, some people searched a lifetime for a moment like this, and I was not going let myself lose it. I could change. I could work harder. I could show her how much she meant to me.

And I would start by making her smile reach her eyes.

.;.;.;.;.;.;.;.;.;.;.;.;.;.;.;.;.;.;.;.;.

"—DDDIEE. "

I was walking back into the fraternity after what I considered a successful lunch with Angela. By the time we were packing up to leave, she had tears in her eyes from laughter and merriment. We had made plans for the upcoming Saturday, and I felt I was back on my way to redeeming myself…

I had taken no more than three steps when I finally heard that loud bellowing voice.

"EDDDDDDDIEE—"

I was promptly tackled to the ground by an unknown, impassable force.

"What the—!" I exclaimed, looking up into the face of my attacker.

It was Emmett…of course.

"Emmett! What was that for?" I asked angrily.

"Oh, this? It's for the fight you will try to get into with me—and inevitably lose—for me calling you Eddie… Eddie," Emmett replied self-assuredly while easily resisting my attempt to wrestle my way out of his hold.

I rolled my eyes.

"You really…don't have to… yell it. I'm right…underneath you…you know." My speech was not as fluid from the effort I was exerting to get him off.

His eyes widened with some realization.

"Oh, _I _see," he mused while nodding his head.

"What do you… see?" I tried pushing against his torso, but still, he didn't budge.

"Eddie, it's okay; you don't need to feel embarrassed. I _understand_. It's natural to feel this way. Well… maybe not _natural_, but towards _me,_ it's understandable." He nodded once again.

"What. Are. You. _Talking_. About." I tried wiggling out from the side.

"—And I'm flattered, truly flattered—" he continued as if I hadn't spoken, and I was starting to feel a little resentful. Here I was, huffing and puffing away, while he could talk irrationally about god knows what, even putting a hand to his heart, while still managing to effortlessly keep me down with the other while he finished his thought.

"—But the thing is, I'm _engaged_ and I'm going be a married man soon, so I am kind of _off-limits_." He looked back down and smiled apologetically.

"What are you— I know you're—" I said, confused and exasperated, then I stopped. I finally understood what he was implying.

"Emmett. Get off. _Now!"_ I said shortly, low and dangerous. Emmett got up and I immediately felt my body loosen up without those couple extra hundred pounds weighing me down.

Emmett, laughing, threw his hands up and said, "I'm just saying…"

"I _really_ don't understand how Rosalie puts up with you," I said disbelievingly. A big, goofy grin stretched across Emmett's face as he thought of his fiancée.

"Me neither," he replied with a grin. As we walked toward the kitchen, he hooked his arm around my neck, capturing me in a headlock while continuing to walk with me in that fashion. There was nothing I could do about it, either. It's not that I was weak—I had my fair share of muscle—but Emmett was like a … six-foot-four tall brick wall. He wasn't gangly by any means; he was muscular in every place someone could be muscular. It was a good thing that he had a sense of fun and humor, or he would just be too intimidating. He stopped for second as he thought of something.

"Hey, when I get to married to Rosie, we'll practically be brothers,"

"Oh, joy," I replied sarcastically. "And how is it that you came with that unreasonable piece of logic?"

"Well, Jazz and Rose are brother and sister, right? And you and Jazz are basically brothers," he replied matter-of-factly, "plus Jasper's bound to marry Alice someday"—I tensed at the thought of my sweet little sister getting married—"And it's NOT unreasonable, so there!" Emmett finished, not noticing my sudden discomfort with the subject. We had reached the kitchen. James was in there talking to some guy. He saw us and started walking over.

"Eddie, my man, how you doing?" he asked.

"I'm doing fine. I would be doing better if _Emmett…_" I paused, glaring up from my current position of head-armpit "…would let go of this head lock. And I told _you_ not to call me Eddie."

Emmett laughed then let go and walked to the refrigerator to make something to eat. James and I walked toward the lounge.

"As usual, the humorless one. Did you get it out already?" James asked. I rolled my eyes and ignored his first comment.

"Did I get what out?" I asked.

"That stick up your ass." He smirked, and then continued, "Dude, seriously what is up? You didn't use to be like this. We used to be really tight—remember the tally board?" He looked over at the white board, which was hung on the wall, and smiled reminiscently.

I guess what he said was true, but it was a very loose interpretation of the word "tight." Our relationship was, in a word, competitive. Or at least it used to be, before I was with Angela. Being the competitive guys we were, we made a bet to see which guy could lay the most girls in a week. Well, that week turned into a month and then months. I'd stopped making tallies after I started dating Angela, but James was still at it. Angela had actually seen it once when she was visiting me and asked what it was.

"_It's a tally board," I had answered curtly._

"_I can see that, but why does it have James' and your names on it? And more importantly, why are there no tallies on your part?"_

_I thanked god I had erased all my tallies once I started actually dating Angela. It was a stupid, thoughtless game, and I was happy to leave that part of my life behind._

"_It's a…Well, me and James, we… You see, I had—" Angela looked at me expectantly as I struggled for the right words. I took in a deep breath and spit it out quickly._

"_It's a tally of how many girls me and James have had I mean just had sex with because we made a bet and it was dumb."_

"_Aaahh, I see." She smiled, looked at it, and then looked back up at me. "It seems that you aren't getting any action."_

"_Hey! I'll have you know I was beating James befor—" I looked at her and realized she was joking. She had started laughing_.

I was brought back to reality when James continued talking.

"This girl that's holding you down, I think you should get rid of her."

I bristled at his rude assumption.

"The_ girl_ has a name, and it's Angela_. _And _Angela_ is not holding me down, nor has she ever, so I think you would do well to keep your opinions about my girlfriend to yourself!"

"Woah, dude, calm down. Breathe in and out"—he motioned with his hands as he took in a breath to show me—"in, out, in, out. Although I can think of more satisfying ways to use those to actions, hey, it's _your _choice."

Just then, Jasper walked in and was about to say hello, but he saw my face and James' smirk and tried to walk right back out. However, Jasper was not that lucky.

"Even _Jazz_ here hasn't held out for that long." James pointed toward him.

I turned my death glare to Jasper.

"Is this to mean you are _cheating _on Alice?" I asked, my voice low and cold as steel. Now Jasper looked scared.

"No!" Jasper replied quickly, but hesitantly, as if he were nervous something worse was coming by saying this answer. I was confused.

"But how can you have not have 'held out' and also not have cheated on Alice?" I demanded. Then realization dawned; I narrowed my eyes, and Jasper braced himself.

"You had _sex _with Alice? Alice, _my_ baby sister?" My voice was thick with anger and disbelief, but hopeful that this was just a misunderstanding.

"We waited till she was eighteen!" he said, and I scoffed—as if that made it all okay! Jasper hurried to explain the rest.

"I tried to hold it off as long as possible—"

"_Sure_ you did," I said untrustingly.

"Because I was afraid of your reaction—"

"As you rightfully _should _have been—"

"And you know Alice, once she wants something, she will go to no ends to—"

"Are you _insinuating _my beautiful baby sister would want _that _with a—with a scumbaggy… _scumbag_ like _you_?"

James burst out laughing, and I would have winced at my choice of adjectives to describe…_it,_ but I was too mad at…. I couldn't even say his name, that, that—

"Scumbaggy Scumbag, huh? I've heard a lot of good ones come out of your mouth, but I think that one is by far the best," James interjected.

Jasper and I both glared at him, and he stopped talking but continued to laugh.

"Edward, you know I would never do anything with your sister that she had even the slightest misgiving about, since she is the best girlfriend I've ever had, and I love her; I don't want to lose her, and…and you are like a brother to me!" Jasper's voice was desperate.

I could see James in my peripheral vision rolling his eyes, but I was too focused on Jasper to care much about what he did. I was a little shocked at his admission of loving her, but what else should I have expected? Hell, he _better_ love her…and I guess the rest of what Jasper said was true. After Jazz started going out with Alice, he started shaping up. Before Alice, like me before Angela, Jasper was a complete player, sometimes even worse than me. He did treat Alice like she was a diamond in the rough—which she was—and Alice didn't even have to break out her whip. And that is not a figure of speech—let me tell you, she actually has a whip, and that's not kinky; that's _Alice_ for you.

"And you've lived with Alice for ten years, you know how persuasive…" for a second a strange look came across Jasper's face "…and stubborn and obstinate Alice is, and how she _will not_ give up until she gets her way."

I sighed; he was right again about Alice's persistence. I shuddered as I remembered the _months _before the senior prom when she was going to be Jazz's date. How she had made me drive her to the mall, hold her bags, and tell her what I thought of all the dresses (I thought they were all too revealing). It was "The Era of Hell" as I not so fondly remembered it. I still wasn't sold on the whole "Alice wanted to do it'' story, but I would find out.

"Wait, what do you mean 'ten years'? Don't you mean eighteen?" James cut in. Jasper and I exchanged a look, on the pretense of friends for a brief moment, before Jasper covered up.

"Oh, yeah, sorry. Sometimes I get ten and eighteen mixed up."

James didn't look convinced.

"Anyway, I won't beat you up, _yet,_ but after I talk to Alice, if I find out that this was anything more than 'her idea,' know that I will gladly pluck every hair off you, pummel you to a pulp, sand down your balls, stick a thousand explosive pins and needles in them, set the needles off, and hang you from the flagpole on campus from your underwear with nothing on but your underwear!"

"This is why I love you guys," said James with mock heartfelt-ness. I shot him a glare.

"If this is your reason for hanging out with us, then you are in grave need of a life."

"Are we cool till then?" a slightly timid Jasper asked.

"No! I wouldn't want to be caught _fraternizing_," I spat out, "with the enemy!"

With that I stormed out of the lounge and upstairs to my room to get some peace and quiet.

.;.;.;.;.;.;.;.;.;.;.;.

After thinking for a while, I realized I wasn't _really_ mad Jasper. I could hardly blame him for not being able to resist my sister. The only thing capable of doing that was most likely a blind, deaf, mute stone. And if I had to choose someone to deflower—I cringed at the word—my sister, then I really couldn't think of a better guy. He was the only guy I had ever known to be able to handle Alice—to a certain extent. That, in itself, was pretty amazing. He was also the only person, outside of Angela and my close family, to know that I was adopted. That was the reason we even met, even if he didn't know it at the time.

When Carlisle and Esme adopted me when I was eight, all I wanted to do was attend the regular public school that was in our district like any other kid on the block. I had started all over there not knowing anybody—which was entirely fine by me—in a first and second-grade mixed class.

I soon realized, though, I didn't know how to act around all these happy, care-free children. True, we were all around the same age in years, and yet I felt so distant from them, isolated—as if my past refused to relinquish its hold over my newfound freedom.

It was in my second quarter of being at a public that Jasper asked if I wanted to sit with him at lunch. We had just gotten new seating assignments, and he was my new row partner; I conceded because I had been so shocked. It wasn't the first time anyone had asked, but it was the first time it didn't feel like a trick. He was just barely more than a kindergartener, and yet something in his… air seemed unrushed, slow to cast judgment, and not yet ready to categorize me solely as the unhappy, un-cooperative, new boy. His invitation did not in the least resemble the previous ploys by too many other curious peers to learn about my unrelentingly past.

True to his word, we just sat and ate. And let me assure you, between my stony silence and his cool, unrushed air, we had many, many intriguing and intellectual conversation with each other.

But we were becoming friends. That was one of the many firsts I had experienced in this new life under Carlisle and Esme's wings. They were the best parents anyone could ever ask for. Kind, caring and loyal, they always listened to both sides of the story, especially when it came to and sibling quarrels.

Alice.

I couldn't avoid calling her forever. I sighed and turned on my side on the bed to reach over to my nightstand to get my cell phone. I dialed the number, and with a deep breath, pressed, "Talk."

After two rings, a high-pitched, musical voice answered the phone.

"Hi, Eddie!" the voice said, then giggled.

"Hello, Alice. Excited much? And I thought I told you not to call me Eddie."

"Well, you didn't," she lied blatantly, "And of COURSE I'm excited! I'm going to be with my big brother, and Jazzie!"

I smiled, happy that she was excited to see me, but then frowned as I recalled whom else she was excited to see.

"So, to what do I owe this pleasure, Edward? It's not like you call that often, without a reason."

"What? I can't call my own sister, with no reason other than to hear her lovely voice?" I asked innocently.

"Haha, nice try, but it's not going to work. Something is bothering you, and plus you always complain about my voice on the phone, since you can't see my expressions to help tip you off when it will be a notch louder than usual."

"When you get excited, the volume of your voice is a great deal higher and earsplitting than a 'notch louder than usual,'" I retorted, then continued sincerely, "…And you have a beautiful voice, when it isn't attempting to shatter my eardrums."

"Okay, yeah, whatever you say. Stop trying to avoid the subject!"

I sighed. I really didn't want to have this discussion with her. Having a conversation on the specifics of her bedroom (dear lord, I _hoped _it's just in her bedroom)activity was probably the epitome of awkwardness, if not for her, then for me.

"It's actually about Jasper," I finally replied.

"Oh, he told you," she said casually.

"Yes. I am calling to see if it is valid," I stated as formally as I could.

"What do you want to know is true?" she asked. I exhaled sharply. Was she going to make me spell it out?

"'You still there? We're talking 'bout sex, right?" she asked.

"Yes," I said sharply.

"Yes, you're still here, or yes to it being about sex?" she tried again.

"To both, and could you please _stop_ saying that word?" It was truly disconcerting hearing my beautiful baby sister use that, that _word,_ so casually.

"What, _sex_?"

I huffed in annoyance. There she went _again_!

"Alice!"

"Okay, okay, _sorry._" She laughed. "So back to the main question, what did you want to know was true? Was it true about how entirely amazing it was? Did I get to use that whip that I only break out on special occasions? If it was utterly and completely more mind-blowing than I could have ever imagined? Or if was true how we went at it for—"

"ALICE! No!" I nearly shouted. Great. Just great. Now in my head, I had my baby sister and my best friend going at it, in a very detailed visual. Nothing I ever wanted to see, think, or hear of again.

I began slowly, measuring my voice, "All I want to know is, when Jasper said it was all your idea, the…sex—and not just a bluff that was preventing me from pounding his face in—if _that _was true."

"Oh, that? Yeah, it's true. I practically had to get naked, and act rejected, for him to even consider it." She stopped for a minute, considering something. "In fact, I can't _imagine_ why it was so _difficult _to convince him, especially when he is usually so good at giving _me_ what _I _want!"

"Alice! I have your best interests at heart, and he was probably thinking of his best chance in staying alive."

"Well, the whole time he was proper gentleman, so much that it was tedious the way he'd ask me, 'Is it okay to do this?' or 'Would you mind if…'"—she gasped—"You probably got into a big fight with him too, didn't you?"

I stayed silent.

"Well, that's just great! I bet he feels really bad, and now he's going to be even more careful about everything than before, if that's even possible! You listen here, Mister!" she ordered. "You are going to find my Jazzie, and you are going to apologize! You are going to get on the ground and you will say 'Jasper, I've been a terrible, quick-tempered, jumping-to-conclusions, horribly atrocious boy,'—and yes you will say _boy_—'who does not deserve the glorious privilege of being your friend. Will you ever find it in your heart to forgive me?'"

"Do I really have to?" I asked, whining.

"Yes! You have to, and you have to say exactly that! Don't even think to try getting around it 'cause I will have Jasper call me to let me know what you said."

"Fine," I said sullenly.

"Do NOT 'fine' me! Get a pen and a piece of paper and write down what you have to say! Ready?" she demanded.

"Yes," I said sullenly.

"Jasper, I've been a terrible, quick-tempered, jumping-to-conclusions, horribly atrocious boy." She paused, waiting for me to write it down, while breathing heavily.

"Who does not deserve the glorious privilege of being your friend. Will you ever find it in your heart to forgive me?"

I wrote it all down resentfully.

"Got it all?" She didn't wait for me to answer. "You WILL go and apologize, and you WILL do it RIGHT NOW! Am I understood?" she ordered.

"Yes, ma'am," I answered against my will.

"I'll be waiting for that call from Jasper!" she said in a slightly threatening tone, and hung up.

I was seconds from petulantly throwing my phone across the room. I would have laughed at my situation, if I weren't so apprehensive that something bad would happen if I didn't do it. For someone so short and sweet, Alice sure knew how to frighten someone.

Well, it wasn't going to get done unless I actually _did _it. And Alice was waiting. That was motivation enough. I swung my legs off the bed, gripped the piece of paper in my hand walked to the door and opened it, and went to search for Jasper.

.;.;.;.;.;.;.;.;.;.;.;.;.;.;.;.;.;.;.;.

Sometimes I thought Angela was lucky to live alone in that little house. I was walking that way, to see her now. A shared living space could amount to too much drama for one day. Emmett, James, Jasper, Alice, Jasper…

I remembered when she had started looking for separate housing, since she had had enough with school assigned roommates. From the first week of summer, she had been searching high and low, far and wide, for just the right type of living. All that entailed, really, was affordability and proximity to campus.

As it happened, the gods seems to smile upon her, as they usually did, and she found a small two-bedroom cottage of a rich, retired old lady. Angela had fallen in love with the cute coziness of the place, and the little old lady was charmed by her. When she asked how much the monthly rent was, certain this was where the catch would be, the lady answered, much to her surprise, "Whatever you are comfortable paying, honey."

Angela, being Angela, chose a price she could just barely afford on her paycheck.

I had asked her later why she hadn't chosen a lower price.

"I couldn't cheat her out of her money."

"But she's already rich and retired," I protested.

"She is offering me the full accommodations of a two bedroom house, for the price of a one. I couldn't go any lower than I could possibly afford," she explained.

I told her she was too kind. And she simply kissed me.

By this time I had arrived at her cozy home. I opened the gate and observed the white picket fence surrounding the yard, walked up toward to pale blue cottage and hopped up the steps of the front porch.

When I came inside, she asked me how the rest of my day had been.

I only slightly modified what had happened with Jasper, so I wouldn't have to repeat to her what James said and about the tally board. She laughed at everything, but thought my phone call with Alice was especially funny.

"The little pixie always has something on me…" she smiled and shook her head "…and I'm supposed to be the older one. Well, I knew she was never as innocent as she can seems."

"What! You _knew _about Alice and Jasper!" I exclaimed, shocked that she would keep something like that from me.

"Well, she is pretty much my only close friend... Edward, don't look at me like that—she _told_ me not to tell you. It's probably because you are the only one who still views her as a darling, pure, innocent child."

"But she is still a child!"

"No, she's actually an adult by _law_, Edward."

"Well, she will always and eternally be my sweet baby sister!" I stated with an air of finality, before continuing more softly, "And you know, she doesn't have to have that particular _something_ on you."

"I know, I know, I'm just not ready, Edward, and that's that," she replied, just as softly, but firmly.

I frowned.

Then, the timer went off. Angela smiled.

…

She had fallen asleep sometime after her third piece of pizza, so I decided to bring her to bed. Scooping her up in my arms, I brought her to her room and gently set her on the bed. Not gently enough, though, since she stirred, and opened her eyes for a moment.

"Hey, hey…you…where are you going?" she asked sleepily as she patted the space next to her on the bed. I thought it was kind of cute that she was so drowsy that she couldn't remember my name.

"I'm going to go throw away the plates. I'll be right back," I said softly.

"Why are you throwing away plates...?" she asked confusedly, then mumbled, "…save the trees..." I smiled at the sweet activist in her.

I walked back to the living room, picked up our paper plates and cup, and brought them to the kitchen.

Once I was done there, I walked back to Angela's room and opened a drawer in her dresser. I took the pajama bottoms she had stored for me, and went to the bathroom to change. I crawled in behind her and put my arm around her waist. You would think that from my womanizing days, I would either be taking advantage of her, or at least wanting to, but I didn't feel that way at all.

Somehow, it was just comfortable and relaxing this way. I was happy with just being with her. I did wonder, sometimes, why she didn't want to go further, though. We had never gotten past wandering hands, and that was only during a rare session of intense kissing, before she pulled away and said, "Sorry, I'm not ready," and then brought it back to a more innocent kiss. But somewhere between all this wondering, I fell asleep too.


	2. Standing in the Doorway

******A/N: ****A dilemma: Imagine a line between T and M ratings. Imagine that you are on the T side of the line. Now imagine that you put one toe over the and onto the M rated side. That's basically what happened here. It's nothing graphic, but what happens could be classified as just a **_**slight smidge **_**more than T.**

**Chapter 6: Standing in the Doorway**

It was the last Saturday before school started up again. Everyone was getting their last bits of summer laziness in—plus, there was the last party of the summer at the fraternity tonight, and who knew what time in the morning that would end.

I wanted to do something to make Angela just as happy as she always made me. I decided call Le Caniche Rose. It was one of the most exclusive French restaurants in town. The reservation was no problem. Being the son of a successful, affluent doctor certainly had its perks sometimes.

Carlisle was much, much more than just successful doctor, though. When I was a kid, there was "Bring Your Kid to Work" day, and Carlisle brought me to the hospital. I got to watch him all day and was amazed by him. He was always so calm and collected, even during emergencies. He always treated his patients with the same understanding care and respect he would treat me with. He always listened to everything the patients had to say, and when it came to a course of action, he always tried to do what was best for the patient, not for the flow of the money into his wallet. He always tried to explain whatever the issue was in the most understandable terms possible to whoever his patient was.

He was, in a word, a saint. After that, he was my role model; I had tried to follow in his steps, but every time I'd tried to work as an intern, I couldn't handle it. Seeing the patients, especially ones with broken bones or bruised and bloody, was just too overwhelming, too evocative.

I really didn't know what I was doing now. Just trying out different things till I found my calling. I was majoring in business because I could do it, but something about it bothered me. I'd have to figure out what soon, or I would be stuck not knowing what to do for the rest of my life.

I went back downstairs and, not surprisingly, Emmett was in there pouring some cereal.

"Emmett," I acknowledged.

"Edwards, what's cracking?" he called back. I cringed.

"Will you _stop_ making nicknames for me? Granted 'Edwards' is a lot better than Ed or Eddie, but it is still annoying."

"So you like Edwards," he mused. I huffed. I really thought Emmett had selective hearing sometimes.

"So, you here for breakfast?" he asked.

"Obviously," I muttered, still a little annoyed.

"Hey! You could be here for a number of reasons!" he defended, as I walked over to the cupboard with cereal.

"Yeah? Like what?" I asked as I poured my cereal and added milk.

"Well, you could be here to simply see me"—I snorted. _Not likely._ He continued, "you be in here to hide from James, or Jasper, or anyone else you could've upset lately…" Hmm. That could be possible."…you could have left one of your oh-so-precious_ books…_"

"Emmett. Enough," I muttered. Emmett laughed at my expression.

"Easy there, little bro, wouldn't want you to get an early coronary. You seriously need to _loosen up._" He came over and sat next to me, and when he saw my cereal, scrunched up his nose, "_Raisin _Bran? Why are you eating that crap?"

"It's healthy"—he wrinkled his nose again—"and you were the one just telling me not to get an early coronary. Do you really think,"—I looked over to what he was eating—"_Coco Puffs_ are going to help with that?"

He shrugged. "I also said you need to loosen up. Raisin Bran isn't exactly a cereal that screams 'I'm loosened up'." I rolled my eyes. Emmett was not giving up.

"Whatever." I sighed, and Emmett laughed again.

"Aren't you excited for that Christmas Family get together we'll have in couple years with Alice and Jasper, Rosalie and most importantly, ME? Think of all that quality time we'll have together!" he said with fake enthusiasm.

"God, kill me now," I breathed, putting my hands together and looking up.

"Good luck with that," he said then left with his bowl of cereal.

I munched on my Raisin Bran slowly. It really wasn't as bad as everyone thought it was. Maybe not exciting, but still, there was nothing _wrong _with damn cereal. I finished it up, washed the bowl, put it away then went back up stairs to call Angela.

"Hey, Edward," she answered.

"Hey, there," I replied.

"When are you coming over?" she asked. I thought about it. I still needed to get her a little something for tonight.

"How about around two?"

"Two sounds good. What's the plan for tonight?" she asked.

"Well, I was thinking we could hang out for a little while, maybe 'til four, then at five o'clock we're going out to dinner—"

"Oh, Edward, you didn't have to!"

"I know, but I wanted to make up for what happened…"

"Oh," was her quiet reply.

"So, the time in between we can use to get ready. The movie is at eight, so 3 hours should be enough time to get there, eat leave, and then get to the movie with plenty of time," I finished, smiling.

"My, my, Edward, you sure have everything planned out." she said with a chuckle.

"It's what I do, my dear," I answered, and she laughed again.

..;.;.;.;.;.;.;.;.;.;.;.;.;.;.;.;.;.;.

I took the bag that had my little gift-wrapped present in it, and hopped into my Volvo. I drove, while faster than appropriate for my surroundings, by no means _fast, _and I got there just in time. I hadn't set a specifictime, just "around two," but I didn't like to be late to whatever time I had set in my head, and two o'clock just happened to be that time. I walked in without knocking, since the door was unlocked, and met Angela who was sitting on the couch reading.

"Hey there. "

She looked upon hearing my voice.

"Heya. Whatcha got there?" she asked, noticing my bag.

"It's a present for you." I cocked my head to one side.

"Well, don't just stand there… let me see it!" she exclaimed, pretending to scold me.

I handed her the bag.

"Can I open it?" she asked seriously.

"Of course!"

She began to open it carefully. She was never the type to rip things open unlike—I smiled at the thought—Alice. Angela's eyes got big as realized what it was.

"Edward, you did not have to do this…" She stared dumbfounded at the beautiful deep purple, floor-length, evening dress.

"But I wanted to," I said honestly. "And plus, I wanted to make sure you looked extra beautiful at Le Caniche Rose," I finished nonchalantly.

"You're too sweet," she said, smiling quite sweetly. Then, as her mind registered what I had just shared, her eyes widened as she exclaimed, "_What!_ Le Caniche Rose, _the_ Le Caniche Rose?"

"Honey, now you are just being redundant; you can't say 'the' twice, and make sense." She whacked my arm.

"What? -When? ...HOW? How did you get a reservation? There's a two-month waiting list!" she asked in disbelief. I just shrugged.

"We Cullens can do anything," I said with a grin. She shook her head.

"Between you and Alice and _this, _I'm honestly starting to believe that." Then she hugged me. "Thanks. It'll be fun." She looked up, smiling at me. After that we just relaxed, watched TV, and talked about random things. Soon, it was four, and I had to leave to get prepared.

"Wait," she said, as I turned to leave, "what am I supposed to wear to the movies?" she asked.

"Well, we could stop by a clothing store and buy something and change, or you could bring some clothes with you," I replied. She actually looked conflicted.

I laughed. "Angela, just let me buy you something; it's more convenient for you and I'm happy that I have someone _special _to spend time and money on."

She sighed, and laughed.

"Well, if you put it that way, mister, I guess I have no choice."

I grinned at her.

"Now get out of here, I have some primping to do!" she yelled, shooing me out with her book. She reminded me of Alice when she did that. I smiled, then realized it was kind of disturbing to be reminded of your sister when you're about to go on a romantic date.

.;.;.;.;.;.;.;.;.;.;.;.;.;.;.

4:50. Time to pick up Angela. I passed Emmett, Jasper and James on my way out, and they took in my appearance.

"Well, _someone's _getting some action tonight," James said with a snicker. I rolled my eyes.

"No, actually, I'm taking Angela on a _date, _and the sole purpose is not to get 'action.'"

"Where are you taking her?" Emmett asked.

"Le Caniche Rose," I answered.

"_Damn_. You Cullens sure know how to roll," James said, impressed. I was _going_ to thank him, but of course his mouth opened again, ruining it. "I still don't see the point in spending all that money if you're not going to get rewarded afterwards."

I was about to reply to that when Emmett cut in.

"Well I'm proud of little Eddie here." I self-consciously looked down, and Emmett laughed, noticing my action. "No, I do not mean _that _lil' Eddie. My little baby's growing up, getting himself a real date," Emmett said in a bogus maternal voice. Jasper laughed, and it was James' turn to roll his eyes.

"Well… Not that it hasn't been anything but … enjoyable talking to you guys…" I said in a sarcastic voice, "…but I have to go and get Angela or I am going to be late."

I knocked on the door. A couple moments later the door opened, and I walked in. I turned around to see her. She looked lovely, as she always did. The purple dress fell to ground and had a modest rectangular neckline. It was refreshing, the way she always kept herself covered up when all other girls had always been forcing their assets into my face. I looked up at her face, and she was smiling shyly. I went to kiss her, and right as I was about to meet her lips her cell phone rang.

"Sorry. I have to take this," she said, blushing a little, ducking her head down to look in her purse.

"Hello?" she answered, "Oh hi, Ann." Uh-oh. This probably wasn't good news if her boss was calling, "What? Tonight?" Her face fell as she replied, "Oh... no, no, it's fine, I understand. Okay, bye." She closed her phone.

"What happened?" I asked.

"Well, tonight a book… I think it's called _Breaking_ _Dawn_ is coming out, and they need all the staff they can get. But a couple people called in sick at the last moment, and they need some other people to work the shift. And I was one of the people to be picked to work," she said sadly.

"What? But, Angela, we have a date!" I exclaimed, even though I wasn't surprised.

"I know. I'm so sorry, but I can't get out of it," she said apologetically.

"You didn't even try! You just accepted it!" I accused. Her eyes widened.

"I can't _argue _with my boss! Especially a very reasonable boss! They don't have enough staff working the shift, so they pick some people who didn't have work that day!"

"What time is it?" I asked, still annoyed, but hopeful.

"From five-thirty," she said nervously.

"To when?" I asked, my eyes narrowed.

"Till one…" she said quietly.

"So what? We just… we just blow this _whole _thing off?" I shouted.

"I'm sorry," she said meekly, "but I have to. Maybe we can do movies another day."

"What about Le Caniche Rose?" I demanded. She sighed.

"I guess I'll never know," she said sadly.

"That's stupid!" I replied. She opened her mouth to speak, but I pushed my lips onto her. I kissed her hungrily, trying to convince her to stay. I pushed us against the door, and pinned her hands above her head. She opened her mouth to say something, but I pressed my tongue through instead. Kissing… trying to make her forget about her job…But no, she brought her arms down, pushed me away, shook her head once and said, breathing heavily, "I'm sorry, Edward. I have to go."

I sighed and closed my eyes. "Fine," I said finally, opening my eyes. "Call me when you finish."

She nodded. "I will." She walked around me and opened the door.

I walked to my car without another word. Even on the drive back to the frat house I was fuming, going as fast I could possibly get in the short distance between. I stormed in, not meeting anyone's gaze, and headed straight up to my room. I plopped onto the bed, grabbed my iPod, picked the angriest music I could find, and turned up the volume. I knew I was being unreasonable; it was just a date, and her job was much more important. We could see the movie any other day, and it would be easy enough to get a table at Le Caniche Rose again.

Ugh. I needed to call off the reservation. I picked up my phone and the piece of paper that had the number to the restaurant on it.

"Le Caniche Rose. Chelsea here, how can I help you?"

"Hello. This is Edward Cullen. I have a reservation at five-thirty."

"Do you need the table earlier? Or later?" Chelsea eagerly inquired.

"No, actually, I don't need it at all."

"What a shame. Do you need to reschedule it for another day?" she asked.

"No, that is all. Thank you, goodbye," I said, then hung up the phone. My unhappy state returned. I went through all that trouble to get everything set up for a nice evening, for Angela and I to have a good time. I had even gotten her a dress! But of course, being the _sweet_, _kind, caring _girl she was, she decided her priorities were her job, her boss, and that stupid book, instead of being with her boyfriend.

I was so disappointed. Maybe guilty? I had wanted to use this chance to make up with her. I was counting on this to redeem myself. And now I was mad at her for robbing me of my chance. I was seriously messed up.

I looked at the clock. Five-thirty. I sighed. If everything had gone as planned, we would be at the restaurant now, talking and most likely having a perfect time. She was at the bookstore. Selling books. Till midnight. I guess I should have felt sorry for her. That book must have been huge if they needed as much staff as they could get… I should have felt grateful that I didn't have to be doing that with the knowledge that I could be on a fantastic date… but I didn't feel grateful at all. So I just turned up the music and stared at the ceiling, trying to drown out all other thoughts besides how intensely off-white I thought the ceiling was.

.;.;.;.;.;.;.;.;.;.;.;.;.;.;.;.

The door opened, and a ray of light came through. I looked at my clock again. 8:30 P.M.

"Edward, my man, what are you doing up here?" James asked loudly, as he ripped out my earphones, and with four other guys I wasn't too fond of. "Weren't you supposed to go on a 'date'?" he sniggered.

I took a deep breath. "Yes, I was. But Angela got a call from work and she had to go," I replied in clipped tone.

"Awww," James said with fake sympathy. "So now wittle Edwad is moping awound with no one to pway wif." He stuck his bottom lip out, and the other guys snickered at his tone.

"I'm not moping," I said.

"Uh-huh. _Right," _a senior named Matt said.

"Come _on_, Edward, there's a big party going on downstairs… and for the lucky ones upstairs too," James sniggered. "Don't let some_ girl _keep you from having a little fun." I did not like his tone. "Remember the good ol' days?" I scoffed.

James continued, "Where _is _the _man _in you? Has he completely disappeared?"

I snorted. "If being a 'man' makes me act like you, I sure hope he has," I retorted.

"You didn't used to think you were doing anything wrong… In fact you used to _like _it," James said.

"And how would _you _know?"

"Seriously, dude, you used to be the best of us," David, a guy my age, said, and James bristled at that. "So it's really _sad_ to see you like _this._"

I froze. I looked at them, their eyes full of … _pity. _I stood up, and I could feel my anger boiling. I didn't need or want anyone to feel sorry for _me. _I hated when people pitied me because it meant that there was something wrong or weak about me that was worth pitying. My hatred for it multiplied tenfold because these _idiots _were the ones feeling _sorry _for _me._

"Fine, I'll go, but only if you get off my back!" I growled. They cheered and hustled me out of the room. I could hear music and smell cheap beer, feel the heat of close bodies and sweat. James and his cronies were called off somewhere. My throat was dry, so I just got a plastic cup of beer. I gulped it down and grimaced. I didn't really like American beer, especially American light beer. I honestly wasn't that much of a drinker, but I was thirsty so I had another. In my earlier college days—merely eight months before—with all my frat brothers drinking so much, it had kind of rubbed off on me. I looked down at the emptied cup and got another one. I sat down on the couch, as I drank it down slower, watching. People were dog-humping—excuse me, _dancing_, and I couldn't understand why people thought it was fun. _Yes you do! You used to do it! _I rolled my eyes. Alright, I may have danced like that before, but I never thought it was fun.

After a half an hour at the bar, downing drinks, while pretending _not _ to be moping I decided it was time for a change of scenery.

I walked back to the couch while still drinking, but some _halfwit_ bumped into me making me spill half the beer down my shirt.

"Idiot! Look what you did!" I bellowed, pointing at my shirt. My assaulter looked at it, then cowered, bumbling out an apology.

"Just get out of my way!" I snarled as I tried to make my way back up to my room. I chugged the last remains of my unfortunately spilled drink. I tore off my shirt, threw it on the floor, not really caring where it landed, and put a new one on. I walked back downstairs, still angry with the stupid cretin! How _dare _he bump into me when I was drinking, savoring my beverage. I stormed off to the aptly named beverage table, grabbing the first drink I could get. I chugged it down to appease my anger, then sauntered over to the wall surrounding the "dance"floor.

I watched people dance, flirt, and make out shamelessly. I saw one redheaded girl throw her head back in laughter at something her friend had said. It must be nice to be able to laugh like that. Stupid lucky wench. I glared at her. She didn't see. I didn't care. It was the thought that counted. I turned to get more beer. I hated her. She should just go and die. Just like my momma. Just like my dense, abusing cretin of a father… _haha_… _I've been using 'cretin' __a lot __this evening… I think I will designate it as my new word…_ Cretin…. Father... pretty much the same thing in my opinion. I went to back to my designated couch. There was a couple making out on it.

"Move," I said. They didn't budge. I shoved them. They landed on the floor. They _still _went at it. I huffed. Stupid Sorority girls. Cretinous frat boy. _Hey.. I used it again_…Angela—never letting me get past second base. I wondered what she was doing. Probably selling books and having the time of her life without me. It was _all _her fault! Here I was, all depressed, while _she_, the cretin, didn't have the _heart _to comfort me. Hell, I didn't think cretins_….wait…if it's a girl do you call them a cretina?... who cares…nobody cares …I care._ I didn't think _cretinas _even _had _hearts. They were simply pure evil… Father and Angela. Cretin and cretina.

Hah. Grr.

I bet they were having a ball right now at the bookstore… having coffee and laughing about me…. they should go to hell… _oh wait, dearest daddykins is already there…I hope. He better be_…StupidAngela…I felt a tap on my shoulder.

_Angela?_

I turned hopefully in the direction of the tap, and there was a set of two conspicuously large boobs in my face. I pulled back_. Woah. Those are fake_. Definitely not Angela. _Not that I would ever know_. Stupid Angela. I looked up into the face of the gifted beholder. Another one. Daniel? Daniella? _I think…I think I'll go with Danny._

"Hey Edward," she purred in a breathy voice, giving me a sultry look with her over-smokied eyes…in fact, if they were any more smoky, the fire alarm would probably go off…and not in a good way… _Wait, _is_there a good way for a fire alarm to go off? _I pondered, then realized I had taken a little to long to answer.

"Hey Danny," I said, giving her a slow grin. She beamed at the name. I wanted to forget about stupid Miss Cretina and Father Cretin. She was probably my best bet. Beer certainly didn't help.

"You know only my close, _close_ friends…" she said, pulling the collar of my shirt "…call me that."

"Oh yeah?" I replied, raising one eyebrow. "And how _close _are these close, _close _friends?"

"Wanna find out?" she said suggestively, leaning in and forcing those artificial goods into my face. I looked up and put on a face that hopefully looked like I was ready for action. I felt kind of out practice, but it worked because next thing I knew she was assaulting my lips with hers. _Blehh_—No. This.. this was good. This was what I _wanted_. I kissed her back, nipping at her lip. She opened her mouth, and our tongues collided together. I let my hands wander but as she started slipping her hand down my pants, I stopped her. She looked affronted.

"Let's go upstairs," I said in a hopefully seductive voice. Her eyes gleamed, and she nodded eagerly. I grabbed her hand and led her upstairs. I opened the door and threw her on the bed. I followed her down, crushing my lips to hers, hard and rough, trying to forget all my problems. Then my phone buzzed once—not a ring, just a notification. I glanced at the screen and saw "1 missed call." Who would be calling now? And did I care?

_No_.

I went back to kissing the crap of Danny. I let my hands wander, and I felt my fingers pulling up her shirt. A stray thought entered my head… _Daddy, Daddy, how could you do that? _I pushed the thought away, but I felt numb. I got it off over her head and started kissing down her neck to her chest, with wet, forceful kisses. She moaned, but I couldn't tell if it was from pleasure or pain.

Her bra got in the way. She arched her back up as I moved my fingers to her back. I unsnapped her bra. I paused. _Maybe I should stop_. She got tired of waiting and threw it off herself, then pushed her head to meet mine and resumed kissing me. It didn't feel right. Why was I doing this? I felt her tug the bottom of my t-shirt, then lifted it, taking the shirt over my head.

I let her.

It was because I was mad. At Angela. At my dad.

Why?

She put one hand in my hair, gripping and pushing me closer while the other was tracing the outlines of my muscles.

Because she had work. Because I was alone. It was stupid. But I didn't stop. I kept on going, planting kisses on her neck, on her collarbone, down her chest. It got lighter in my room. I thought it was just in my head. That is, until I heard a very feminine gasp. I turned around and squinted.

It was Angela. Standing in the doorway, hand over her mouth, eyes wide.

Shit.

I got up off Danny as quickly as I could, but as Angela's eyes got even wider I realized that was a mistake. I looked back at Danny, and realized Angela could _now_ see all of Danny, and her synthetic glory. I heard receding footsteps and turned to run after her, but Danny tugged my arm.

"You can't leave!" Danny exclaimed in a whiny voice. I ripped my arm from hers.

"Yes, I can, and I am. By the time I'm back I hope you are gone," I said as I raced out the door. Harsh? Yes, but true and necessary. I caught up to Angela in the middle of the hallway.

"Angela!" I called. She tried to go faster, but I clutched at her arm. "I'm sorry." My tone was apologetic. She looked up at me, her eyes brimming with tears.

She took a deep breath. Then still looking down, replied with a voice shaking quietly, "I forgive you." I was surprised —no, more like astonished. Maybe I shouldn't have been since this _was _kind Angela we were talking about, but this was further than I'd ever gone before. Where was that bitch-slapping or the profanity? Instead I got her acceptance of my apology? She tried to turn and walk away, but I kept my grip and turned her right back around.

"What happens now?" I asked, confused.

"Call me tomorrow when there isn't a _half-naked girl_ in your room,"she spat bitterly, and though her eyes softened immediately, it was with sadness.

"I'm sorry," I whispered, again, regretfully. She looked up at me.

"I know," she said softly, with an almost… understanding tone to it. And in her eyes wasn't anger or hate. They had some... sad understanding in them that I couldn't quite figure out. She brought her hand up slowly to my face and cupped my cheek with her fingers for a moment, and then… she was gone.

**A/N: I love Angela. I really think that her character is, sadly, one of the most unrecognized, even though she's kind of a saint.**

**As always, reviews are appreciated :) Let's show Angie some love.**

**Thanks so much to Edwardsfavoritebrunette and BigBlueBoat for awesome beta-ing :) **


	3. Shelter From the Storm

**Chapter 7: Shelter From the Storm**

**A/N: I wanted to thank my first two annoynoumous reviewers! It means a lot, so thank you!**

* * *

_Angela_

* * *

Once I was out of Edward's sight, I ran out of that horrid house, gathering sneers as I went. When I had gone up, I had brushed them off because I was so excited that Ann had let me go early from work because I'd told her about what Edward had planned. I thought it was because of the way I was dressed—nothing but my arms, neck and face were exposed. Now I knew why.

It sickened me, not because of what Edward did, but because of what that made me in their eyes: a stupidly trusting, naïve girlfriend. I knew I wasn't stupid or naïve for trusting him; I didn't feel stupid or naïve, even now, for trusting him. I took a deep breath and tried to reorganize my thoughts.

_It was embarrassing_. Walking up there, with everyone's eyes on me, knowing what would happen when I got to his room.

I parked in front of my house, unlocked the door, and walked in.

_I always had hated fraternities. _

Many of the guys were just sex-crazed pigs. Many of them viewed women as toys—fun to play with, disposable and easy to get a new one. Edward wasn't like that. Sure, he had acted like the worst of them in the past, but that was only a mask. A façade to hide how sweet he really was, how small he really felt. A wall to protect him from all the hurt he had gone through. It was a pain I was one of the few to be privileged to understand. That was why I couldn't be mad at him. I understood it.

But it hurt. A lot.

I sank down on my bed. Tears slowly leaked down my face. I leaned my head back. I needed to talk to someone. I reached over and called the only person who would be on my side.

"Hello?" the musically high-pitched voice said.

"Alice," I said, my voice cracking, "This is Ang—"

"Angela! You poor baby…I can't believe him!"

"Wait, how? I mean, how did you know? What do you know? –Has it already gotten around Forks?" I asked, my tears stopping for a moment, confused and worried.

"No, silly. Jasper just told me there was going to be a 'Back to School' frat party tonight, and I got that feeling that if Edward went, he would get drunk and do something stupid. And plus… you sound all sad."

"Oh. W-why didn't you tell me?" I asked in a small voice.

"Because I thought you would be together tonight, on a date," she clarified apologetically. "I'm so sorry."

I sniffled. "S'okay."

"Now, you need to tell Auntie Alice all that happened!" she demanded.

"I don't know where to start." My voice sounded a little hopeless.

"Well, why don't you begin with why you weren't on a date?" Her voice changed to a consoling tone.

I took a deep breath and then started filling her in.

"How did Edward take it?" she inquired carefully about his reaction to my boss's phone call.

"Well, he got mad, then—then he left," I responded quickly.

"I get the feeling that's not all that happened here. Come on, out with it!" she demanded.

I sighed.

"Well… After he argued for me to stay, he kind of attacked me with his lips…" I said, trailing off.

"_He attacked you with his lips?"_ Alice screamed.

I had to hold the phone away from my ear while she calmed down.

"So, little Angie getting hot and heavy with my brother. What was it like?" she finally continued.

"Hey! Keep in mind I am a _year _older than you! And _besides _the fact that it is sort of awkward for me to talk to you about your brother's kisses, I don't really want to remember, since he's not going to be my boyfriend for long…"

"Ohhh. Right, I'm sorry—Wait. Did you just say he's not_ '_going to be_' _or he '_isn't'_?" I could practically hear her eyes narrowing.

"Uhh..." I slowly replied, clearing my throat nervously "…going to be?"

"WHAT? He _cheated_ on you, and you are _still_ technically his girlfriend?"

"Well, he was topless, in the middle of making out with some topless girl, on his bed! I couldn't do it there!"

"Edward. Did. What?" she asked, her voice deadly, slightly reminding me of him in question.

"Well,"—nervous now for the welfare of her brother—"he was drunk? And he didn't know I was coming, shoot, _I _didn't even know I was coming, but some other employees made it, and Ann said I was free to go and—" Alice cut me off.

"That boy…" she paused to take a breath "…is-SOO-STUPID-SOMETIMES! I mean, I knew he was probably going to do something dumb, but this? _This_ is horrible! How could he do that to you? You are the best thing that's ever happened to him! I am going to_ kill _him!"

"No! Don't, Alice!"

"And _why _should I not?" she challenged.

"Because he's your brother. Because he's probably having a real hard time right now. Because I don't want to make it worse," I answered softly.

"Well, it _makes _it worse that he's my brother because I know he can be better than that! And what are you talking about? It's _his _fault for making out with that girl while you were working! He deserves to feel bad for how he's betrayed you!"

"Alice, I don't think he does. Just please, for me, don't make this harder for him," I pleaded, whispering. That softened her up.

"Okay," she conceded gently. "For you I won't."

"Thank you."

For a moment it was silent, then she spoke.

"Ang, I just don't know how you do it. How can you be so kind and forgiving all the time? Don't you hurt at all?"

I sighed softly.

"I know, in the end, he didn't want to hurt me. I know it was the alcohol that swayed his regular reasoning. He was all alone… and right now he is truly sorry…" she was quiet again "…And of course I hurt. It always hurts to see someone you love do something like that to you."

"Alice?" I questioned, wondering where she was in the silence.

"Sorry, you just know him so well. It makes me wonder whether I should have the right to be his sister."

"Oh, Alice, how can you even say something like that? You have every right to be his sister; you know him like other people don't, not even me. You have a special place in his heart that _no one _can take away, and he will _always _love you unconditionally—just like I know you love him," this I said with confidence.

"You love him too," she pondered, but it wasn't a question. "If you love him, how can you let him get away with this?"

"He's my best friend. Besides you, he truly is. I can't make him love me, and besides he already does, it's just not the way we've been implying this whole time."

"That doesn't make sense."

"And it probably won't to your brother either, but that's what's happened. That's why I don't want to hurt him more than I have to. Because I love him. That you _must _understand."

"Yeah… I guess I do. But still, I'm sorry you had to go through that."

"Don't worry, it's was bound to happen. And you won't tell anyone about this, will you?"

"Angela!" she chided, the naturally animated tone coming back into her voice as she pretended to be aghast, "I am _shocked _that you would even have to _consider_ such a thing!"

"Okay, okay, I'm sorry." I looked at the clock; it was around eleven. "I think I should go to bed now, but you have to call me when you arrive so I can see you!"

"I will, I promise! I can't believe it! It's just in a couple of days!"

I could practically see her bouncing in her bed. "It'll be nice to have a good friend around again." I yawned. "Well, g'night," I added tiredly.

"Good night!"

I yawned once more and hung up. I wiggled out of my pants, took out my hair, and slid into bed without brushing or washing or taking off any makeup. I didn't want to think about the most likely unpleasant talk I was going to have with Edward tomorrow.

I just wanted to sleep. Sleep, fortunately, was not so far away.

.;.;.;.;.;.;.;.;.;.;.;.;.;.;.;.;.;.;.

**Edward**

I felt horrible. Disgusting. Foul. Despicable. And least of all, drunk. Again. You'd think I'd learn my lesson the first time. I felt like my father. Weak. Deceitful. Abusing. Intoxicated. I remember the last time I was like this. It had been nine months before. I had, for some reason or another, gotten plastered. I remember stumbling around, snapping at anyone who got in my way, and getting lost.

Nobody cared.

I remember getting outside, wandering drunkenly and aimlessly, before finally giving up my purposeless search. I sat on the cold, hard ground with my back up against the entrance to an alleyway, heaving dry sobs. I hated myself. My father. For putting this burden on me. Drunk and hopeless.

She had been there to save me then. She was always around to help.

It was the first time I'd really _met_ Angela. Sure, she had been at the house often, but I'd never talked to her. She never threw herself onto me, unlike other girls who had tried to come over under the pretense of wanting Alice's company. She was there to be Alice's friend, and she didn't care about the money or status. I guess I respected her…indifference? No, it was the way she kept to herself. I never felt the need to impose since I understood the value of privacy.

I heard my being name called. I looked up, to the side, and to the street. She was there, a couple feet away, walking carefully toward me. She crouched down to eye level with me.

"Edward, what happened?" she asked, as if we had known each other forever, like she was concerned, and… and like she _cared_. I felt this wetness on my cheeks, realized I was crying and stared at her helplessly. My head hurt, and I was lost and lonely and she just wrapped her arms around me, feeling so sweet and caring and _right. _

"I'm s-soo.. so s-sad," I blubbered in a very uncharacteristic way.

"Why?" she asked again, with that same tone of concern that was comforting in its familiarity. I wiped my eyes.

"My daddy's a meanie," I said, pouting again. She looked confused.

"C-Carlisle?"

"No, no!" I shook my head over exaggeratedly. "Edward."

"Edward?" she asked again, needing clarification.

"Yup. Fucking Edward Masen Sr."

Her eyebrows went up at my use of profanity, but she still looked confused.

"But …how? Was Esme with …Edward Sr. before being with Carlisle?"

"Uh-uh!" I said, shaking head again. "Guess what?"

She smiled softly. "What?"

"I'm adopted!" I shouted, then my face turned sour. Her eyes widened, and she looked shocked.

"W-_what_?" she asked in disbelief.

"Yes, I was adopted when I was eight, and I came to live with Carlisle and Esme, and Alice."

"What happened to your real daddy?" she asked softly. I scowled.

"He's not my real daddy. he's a horrible, abusing, fucktard of a person!" I cried out.

"Oh, oh, I'm sorry. I mean, what happened to this Edward Sr.?"

"He died," I said as I shrugged, then yawned. She smiled softly again and spoke.

"How 'bout we get you home—I think you've had enough excitement for tonight… Is it okay if I take you to my dorm?" I nodded again sleepily, but honestly I was quite grateful. I would hate to have any of my frat brothers see me in this state: crying, wasted and pathetic.

She stood up and offered her hand. I ignored it, not to be rude, but because I thought my usually infallible balance could handle the task. I was obviously wrong; as I got up, I wobbled, tripped over my feet and stumbled a couple steps. Before it could get any worse, Angela grabbed my arm and steadied me.

"Whoa there, pardner."

She brought my arm around her shoulder and allowed me to lean into her as I took one treacherous step, and then another, before relaxing. As we walked along, my head bobbed at random intervals to an unknown beat, until I saw a bottle of beer in a trashcan.

"Inane beer, doltish beer," I said, throwing all the adjectives for "stupid" (that I rarely used, and probably wouldn't fit) to describe the object. "Moronic Me…Pea-brained Pop. Hah! Pea-brained…accurate enough…..stupid _daaad_…" I drawled out, ducking my head, and getting gloomy again. Angela looked at me curiously.

"Edward, you need to tell me what this is all about." I squinted my eyes at her.

"Well, you don't _have _to, but I think it'd make you feel better. You deserve better than having your past weigh you down."

I don't know why I did it. It wasn't like I hadn't been loved since being adopted. And maybe even before. Maybe it was the fact that she sounded so sincere. Maybe it was how, in her voice, I could tell she wouldn't tell a single soul about anything I said. Maybe it was how she had been there for me when I was feeling so, so alone. Whatever the reason, I told her.

What kind of man my father was. How I didn't really remember much about my mother. How I met Jasper. Exactly how my parents died. What I thought of Carlisle and Esme. How I felt about the piano at the local music store. How it had been my best distraction, at least during high school. I told her that was the reason too for my constant using of girls—to get away from rational thinking, to be someone else, to be born in, and only under the perfect life of a Cullen. How I feared I was no different than my biological father.

Even the little things that just popped through my mind, like how my least favorite color was yellow. That I loved the rain and I hated story time. That I hated lies, although I was a frequent liar myself. How my best subject had always been math.

How I wished I were braver.

Her eyes were usually focused ahead, concentrating on getting us home in one piece, but I could tell she was listening in the way her breathing would start and stop at certain parts, or the way her caring eyes would flick to mine.

Eventually we reached her dorm.

"Here comes the hard part…good thing I'm only on the second floor…" she said as we got to the stairs.

After we _finally _got to the top of those tiring singular flight of stairs, she walked me down the hallway to her dorm.

"I hope Kate isn't in there with yet _another_ boy, having crazed monkey sex," she muttered under her breath. She leaned her ear against the door to listen and mouthed an "All clear."

"Angela! I wasn't aware you used such terms as 'crazed monkey sex,'" I exclaimed, trying to sound shocked, but it came out a little slurred. She blushed.

"What? There really isn't any other term to _describe _what it is they _engage_ in_,_" she said, shuddering. "Believe me, I've witnessed it."

I was about to ask her to elaborate, but we had gotten to the beds by then.

She folded the covers over so I could sit down on the sheets, and ignoring my half-hearted attempts to shake off my shoes, she took them off herself. She pushed me backwards to have me lie on the bed. It did feel nice to lie back and relax. I closed my eyes for a moment and realized how tired I really was, and how ready I was for sleep. She patted my head then stood up and started walking away.

"I'll be right back, okay? I need to make a call."

My eyes flew open, and I struggled to keep them so—had I misinterpreted her character for that of a gossiping kind?

The last thing I heard was Angela's voice saying, "Hey, it's Angela...Yeah, don't worry…. No, he's chilling with me… Think you could bring some pajamas for him?..."

I had woken up that morning feeling a little disoriented with a horrible pounding in my head. I blinked my eyes a couple times, trying to adjust my eyes to the dim light that was blinding in my current state. I turned my head to the immediate right and saw some V8, crackers, Advil, and a big bowl on a nightstand. I reached over without moving much of my body to take a swig of the V8. I wondered who had known I would need this for my severe headache. I looked further down my right and saw Angela sleeping in a chair. Why was I in, I assumed, Angela's dorm?

Then… I remembered. Me going to the club. Me getting drunk. Me wandering around without any sense of direction. Me crying all alone in the alleyway. Angela hugging me, listening to me, and helping me. Something about crazed monkey sex. I paused at that thought, a little scared. I quickly checked under the covers. I was still fully clothed, with a pair of flannel pajama bottoms cleverly concealing my privates. I sighed in relief, but my quick actions from a moment ago caught up with me, and I winced in physical pain.

It's not that Angela was an undesirable lay, but Alice would have _killed me_ if I had done such a thing and considered her as only that. Also, it would have been a little awkward for me not to remember having sex with my baby sister's best friend.

With that possibility dealt with, I thought of the more pressing matters. She knew everything. Now what was I going to do? Just leave and pretend to forget this ever happened? That would be the best, but in my present predicament, I didn't think I could actually do the "leave" part without help. How was I going to avoid the subject if she brought it up? But before I could come up with anything, Angela's eyes fluttered open. She yawned, stretched out, then looked at me and smiled.

"Good morning, Edward," she said, getting up. "How are you doing this fine winter morning?"

"Terrible," I croaked. "I have a splitting headache, my body aches, and I want to throw up."

Maybe if I could keep her concentrated on my hangover at hand, I could escape before we got to the subject of last night.

"Hence the bowl beside you," she said, smiling lightly. I looked to my right again. I had wondered what that was for.

"Well how 'bout some French toast? I heard that it was good for hangovers."

"French toast sounds lovely, but you really don't have to expend your kindness so far; I can just as easily go home to get something to eat."

I only lied about the "easily" part, struggling to get up in the least discomforting way. Angela put a hand on my chest, pushing me back down. I winced as the impact of my body hitting the bed came back to my head.

"Sorry," Angela mumbled apologetically, "but you aren't going anywhere until you at least have something in your stomach to ease your hangover."

She walked back towards the kitchen, and a few moments later, I heard some rustling in the kitchen—she was probably looking in the refrigerator.

I had been watching her carefully, to see any signs of her broaching the treacherous subject, but so far I had seen none. Maybe she had forgotten all about it.

I heard some sizzling, and the smell of cinnamon wafted over to the bed. Angela came in with my French toast on a tray with two bottles of Gatorade. She put the tray on a desk, then came over to help me get situated. Once I was sitting with my back against the wall behind me, she put the tray on my lap.

"Why Gatorade?" I asked, noting the unusual choice of breakfast drink.

"Well, I…" she blushed "…I don't really get drunk enough to have hangovers, and I really don't know what remedies are the best, so I kind of researched it on the internet, and I found that there was this one medicine made to rehydrate the body, and the active ingredient in that was also in Gatorade." I raised my eyebrows.

"You _researched _it?" She cracked a grin.

"Oh, just shut up. Eat your food," she replied, laughing.

I was done with my first piece of toast, moving on to the second piece, and Angela hadn't said a word. I personally didn't mind the silence; it wasn't awkward at all, but I was getting anxious for what might _follow_ the silence.

"Edward?" Her voice cut through the comfortable quiet. I looked up apprehensively.

"Yes?"

"You don't need to pretend."

"Huh?"

"I just mean that you can just be yourself around me. You don't need to lie to me either." I narrowed my eyes, but she continued, "I know it'd be easier for you to forget this whole event, but I think you should have at least one person to be yourself with. That way you can go on as usual with everyone else without worrying about slipping up."

It _was_ tiring sometimes. I guess she could tell I was wavering because she said, "I'm here for you. I always will be."

Well, she wasn't here now. She wasn't here when I was alone in the dark, once again. But that was my fault. Everything was always my fault. I was forever screwing things up. And I really screwed things up now. After all Angela had done for me, never blaming, always listening, always ready to forgive. All because Angela, the one woman I _did _care about, had to_ work. _

She probably thought I had returned to being the same old, dirty manwhore that I was before I met her. I knocked my head back on the wall. How could I have hurt her like that? Maybe, somehow, she would find it in her heart to forgive me? She always forgave me when I didn't deserve it, had always looked past my faults when she shouldn't have, so maybe she could find in her big heart to let this one slide.

But that would not be fair to her.

_God_, I thought, running my hand through my hair and pulling at the roots, _I just want things to go back to how they were before the date tonight._

I fell asleep sometime past four. I woke up with the same throbbing hangover I'd had that fateful day—the turning point of our previously nonexistent relationship. I blinked and waited a couple minutes, hoping to ease the hurt in my head as well as in my chest. It didn't work. No use delaying the inevitable. I swung my feet over the side of the bed because no one else was going to help me.

_Oh. Dizziness._ I gripped the edge of my bed to _get_ a grip. As soon as the dizziness went down to a manageable amount, I dialed her number. I tapped my foot nervously as it rang.

"Hello?" her voice answered.

"Hi, it's um… Edward." I held my breath, waiting for her answer, and expecting the worst.

"Hi, Edward," she said quietly. That…that was it? No tantrum, no "YOU STUPID BASTARD! I HATE YOU! NEVER CALL ME AGAIN!" Hmm. Maybe things would be okay and all work out.

"We should talk," she continued calmly, with not one hint of anger—and believe me, I would have heard it. I was straining my ears so hard that I could have heard a dog-whistle. But there was a little sadness.

"When would you like to?" I asked.

"Anytime you are ready."

"Well, I need to take a shower and eat some breakfast, so… is in a half an hour okay?" I asked tentatively.

"Yes, of course. See you then."

.;.;.;.;.;.;.;.;.;.;.;.;.;.

I knocked on her door. She opened it after a moment. Her eyes looked a little puffy, like an aftereffect of crying. I hated to see the proof of her pain.

She led me to the couch and sat down, and then she motioned for me to do the same.

"So you needed to talk?" I asked nonchalantly, but really I was nervous as hell. It was quiet for a moment. I looked at her. She was studying me. Finally, she spoke.

"Edward," she said as she took a deep breath, "I don't think we should be boyfriend and girlfriend anymore."

I inhaled sharply. I did not know what I had been expecting, but it definitely wasn't this. This, it, just wasn't Angela. She didn't just break up with people.

"_What? _You're… dumping me?"—just saying that hurt, so I tried to put up a tougher front—"After everything I've told you, and all we've been through, just like that?" She winced at my words.

"I didn't say I was going to leave you. I just couldn't be with you romantically," she replied quietly but firmly. I looked at her face to see what it was she was _really _saying. But once I saw her eyes, I knew she meant every word.

"You want to be _friends_?" I asked as incredulously as I could. She just nodded; she didn't even wince as I thought she would, when I implied that she was just using the same cliché everyone else used to break-up with people they had no actual intention of ever hanging around with. But there was something, somehow, defeated in that nod. I didn't understand it.

"I said I loved you," I tried again, my voice sounding hurt. Outside my family—and even then not often—I had never uttered those three solemn words to anyone. She looked up at my words, sadness written in her eyes. But behind the sadness was determination.

"I know, and I love you too," she said sincerely, earnestly. I scoffed.

"So, are you breaking up with me because you _love_ me? That's crazy! I'd never do that if I truly loved someone!" I nearly shouted.

"Let me finish"—I opened my mouth to say something, but she looked up at me pleadingly and said, "Please, Edward." I couldn't help but nod my head in submission.

"You love me. And I know I love you. We love each other."

"Your _point_?"

She put her fingers to my lips and shushed me.

"It's just not the way you think," she said simply. She lost me there. I gave her a questioning look, and she continued, "You say you love me, and I know you mean it, but not in the romantic sense."

"How could I say 'I love you' and not mean it in the 'romantic sense?'" My voice was rising again, and I ran a hand through my hair in frustration.

"Because you love me as your friend, your best friend possibly. Maybe the same, maybe more than the way you love Jasper." My eyebrows furrowed as I heard what she was saying.

"I've never felt this way toward _Jasper_. Hell, I've never felt the way I feel toward you toward anyone else! I've never told _Jasper _I love him. I've never wanted to _kiss Jasper_," I spat out humorlessly.

"Jasper's a guy, and guys never say it, but that doesn't mean you don't love him, that you don't feel a kinship for him…"

In a way, she was right. I couldn't think of much I wouldn't do for him, and he was the only friend I had ever connected with. He'd been with me through it all. I guess that could be construed as love. But Angela wasn't finished.

"…Ever think the reason you've never felt the way you feel with me is because you've never had a girl that is simply supposed to be your… friend? Never had someone that you could just be you, no lies or pretenses?"

"Then why do I like to kiss you? Regular, platonic friends aren't supposed to like kissing each other!"

"Because it's comforting to you," she said, as if it were obvious.

"What?" I asked, throwing my hands up in the air.

"Because you had never had anything, anyone, that was simply always there for you."

"Like you are now," I muttered under my breath. She ignored it.

"You sought comfort and solace, and you found it with me."

"Then why was I always pushing for more? If I truly just sought 'comfort and solace?'" I motioned air quotes around her words.

"Because you _wanted_ to feel more. I could see it in your eyes, though. You felt like you were kissing your best friend. And you didn't like that. You wanted to know that this was the love you were looking for. You thought it'd be impossible to open up this much, and that you'd never feel this way toward anyone else."

Was it just me, or was she starting to sound condescending?

"I was never _searching _for love! I would never get so desperate! And it's not like I 'found' it anyway!" She looked at me straight on.

"Yes, you did find love. It just wasn't what you were looking for," she replied, almost obstinately. I was a little surprised.

"You sure have a lot of answers," I said, to cover up my pause.

"I'm just doing the best I can under the circumstances." And then, she _smiled _up at me. Like she had a reason for smiling. _Infuriating_. How could she find something to smile about at time like this?

"So when you kissed me, it felt like you were kissing your best friend?" I demanded, narrowing my eyes. But she just smiled again. And shook her head.

"No, _no_, of course not! When I kissed you, it was _amazing_. It was like 'wow. I am kissing _Edward Cullen_. The Adonis himself is kissing _me._ How could life get any better than this?'"—I couldn't help it, my ego just puffed up a little bit, but that momentarily non-livid feeling went away as soon as she spoke again—"but, Edward, I could see it. I could feel it," she paused, thinking over something, "Or _couldn't _feel it." I actually _blushed_ at her talk of my lack of "_feeling_," "You couldn't find those fireworks that you were looking for—"

"I was never looking for any damn 'fireworks' to begin with! How many—" she cut me off, just like I had cut her off.

"I know you better than I know myself"—this, I hated to say, was possibly true. And this was one of the few moments I actually regretted having her know everything about me—"and I know what you are looking for, since I'm not embarrassed to say we're all always looking for love whether we acknowledge that or not, whether it be platonic or romantic. And I know you haven't found what you were looking for in me, so I'm not going to keep you from finding those fireworks I _know_ you crave somewhere deep down." She held her head up high, and spoke assuredly. I wasn't about to let her feel so high and mighty, and_ smug _over me.

"…And I am not going to hold you back," she actually had the _nerve_ to continue, "I am your friend, possibly one of your best, and I love you, so I'm not going to keep you from what you deserve!" I shook my head, listening to her words.

"How can you even _justify _that? I wouldn't ever just _leave _someone I truly loved. If I loved them and they loved me then there would be no way I could be _'holding them back_'!" I shouted.

She sighed.

"It's the best way. I'm sorry if it hurts you."

"So, you're breaking up with me because of some romance novel thing?" I asked disbelievingly. "You _really _shouldn't base your life off of those; they're just products of the over-active imagination of people with too much free time," I said disdainfully, as I tried to get a rise out of her. Her calmness was becoming unnerving.

"No, I'm just not going to be your _girlfriend, _because you deserve everything you can get," she said softly. The _exact opposite _reaction of what I was looking for.

"So you just want to be my _friend,_" I asked sarcastically, returning back to square one. "Like I would want to be _yours._" Her eyes widened, with a little hurt, and it felt good.

If she was hell-bent on tearing me apart, I would _gladly _return the favor.

"_Edward_"—oh, _now _she starts the pleading—but then she put up her hand, cupping my cheek like she had last night, and… I let her. I felt my eyes close and my face lean into her hold. I couldn't help it—she always felt like home.

"_Please_," she whispered, "please, don't do this. You don't need me to be your girlfriend. I'm perfect as your _friend. _I know you don't want me anymore than as a friend. So please, just let me _be _your friend." She looked deep into my eyes, and I could now see there were tears brimming in hers, and I almost gave in, but then I remembered _she _was the one _dumping me_, I wasn't about to give her the satisfaction of _anything_.

"You're right," I said, nodding, and she looked confused, but wary, of my sudden surrender.

"I don't want you, I don't need you, I don't even want to ever _see_ you as a friend. I was foolish enough to let it get this far with a stupid girl like _you,_" I spat out with as much venom as I could muster. I slapped her hand off my face. "And you were right about something else too. I never loved you."

I heard her sharp intake of air and saw the pain in her eyes. Good. She had always been all about sharing my pain. Well, now she could feel how it felt to be completely screwed over by the one you trusted.

I turned to walk out the door. She stopped me, grabbing my hand and holding on to it tight, so I couldn't shake it off. I turned back to her agitatedly.

"I still want you to know that you can come and talk to me anytime about anything." Her voice was clear and strong, a contradiction of the tears she was struggling to keep in, a contradiction of the way she was softly, sweetly, kindly, squeezing my hand. And I remembered I loved all the contradictions about her.

Her quiet strength.

Her unshakeable kindness.

Her shy courage.

I almost gave in, _again. _I almost said, "okay, maybe we can work this out," but then I recognized it. The look I had seen yesterday, but I couldn't quite figure out.

Pity.

It was pity. She had _pitied _me this whole entire time.

"That is _not _going happen. Goodbye, _Angela._" I snapped. I ripped my hand out of hers for the last time and stormed out.

But not before I heard her say, "Know who loves you, Edward. "

I slammed the door and jumped in my car. I had to get out of there.

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I was hours away from Seattle. Which meant a lot with the speed I was going at. I had crossed a couple of state borders by now, and the sign said I was in California. Northern California. It wasn't bad. In fact, I rather liked it better than southern parts, without all its bustling, smog filled highways. Then again, I was the only one I could see on Interstate 5. But not even empty, tree-lined roads could keep my mind off what had just happened.

_Know who loves you. _

Images of her hurt face kept on haunting my mind, my eyes every time I blinked. I was currently trying to see how long I could go without shutting my eyes and seeing _those _wide light brown eyes.

_Know who loves you. _

I gave up and blinked. This time, I kept them closed. I refused to think about how my conscience was telling me that I should be ashamed about what I had said to her. I focused on that _look_ I had finally figured out. The lookthat made my insides churn.

_Pity_.

I wondered when it had made its appearance in her eyes. Probably from the very beginning. I couldn't believe her. I had _trusted _her.

No—I couldn't believe myself_._ How could I do that? I was foolish, so _stupid _to let someone in so far. Letting myself think that someone could want to be around me because of _me _and not about what had _happened _to me. Another reason why I shouldn't tell people about my past. They'd get all scared I'd become suicidal, or something to that equivalence. I bet she was having a real laugh right now at my expense.

Now, I could see it so clearly. Angela had never loved me. She was just a liar, a pretender, and a fake. She had only stayed around to see how far she could string me along, how much she could get out of me, before dropping me cold.

What a cold-hearted _bitch._

I couldn't see how anyone could get a kick out of someone's pain. It was just… cruel_._ Well, I was Edward Cullen. I was not going to be the butt of anyone's jokes ever again. I would ignore this gnawing pain I felt inside my chest. Pain was just a figment of one's imagination. I would simply dismiss it. I closed my eyes again and concentrated.

There. Done.

I opened my eyes up again and stared down the road, determined. She would see how little harm she had done to me. She would see that I was not damaged in any way, even after all her cruel schemes to break me down. How I had never needed her, and would never need her. I would cut her out of my life as easily as she had _obviously _done with me. I switched to the exit lane to head back.

She would know to never, ever mess with Edward Cullen again.

* * *

**A/N: I used one of my favorite _Just Listen _(by Sarah Dessen) lines here. "I'm just doing the best I can under the circumstances."**

**It's over! Done! The dreaded Angelward (or Edgela? haha) is done for! ...Though not without cost to both of them...**

**DAH DAH DAHHHHHHNN. **

**The break-up is everything I wanted it to be. I'm so happy with it. **

**Reviews are appreciated.**

**-pinkdogsare...happy :) **


	4. Defying Gravity

**Chapter 10: Defying Gravity**

**A/N: Finally, the first Bella chapter! I wanted to write her for so long, so finally, is right :) Also, I know Bella is supposed to be from Phoenix, but Tucson works so much better for me, so I used that instead!**

* * *

Bella

* * *

"Bella!" A lady's voice called from down the hall. Presumably my mother's.

"Coming!" I yelled back. I was excited. Very excited. I, Bella Swan, was going to college. That's right, _college_. And not just any ol' college, but the college of my choice. I flew down the hallway—something very unwise and treacherous for someone as clumsy as me—to where Renee was waiting in the kitchen for me, alongside with Phil.

One of the other reasons I had picked a college in Seattle was that it was close to family, but far enough from Tucson that I wouldn't have to visit often, and more importantly, not have to witness the post-honeymoon coital glows. I mean, I love Renee, and Phil's cool. I really had no problem with the guy, but honestly, she was my _mom_. It was a little too much for me. I heard a police car siren come closer to the house. My eyes widened in horror.

"No. No! Charlie DID NOT bring the cruiser! And why is he ringing the stupid alarm? He never uses them on visits!" I exclaimed, clearly afraid, and anxious of what the truth might be.

"Bella, honey, cut Charlie some slack, his baby girl is going to college today, so he might not be all in the right mind."

"Mom. You do realize you are subjecting me to 32 hours in a car with a crazy man?"

"Bella! I never said he was crazy! I only meant that your father isn't very good at taking the fact that you are growing up well."

Before I could respond to that, the doorbell rang, announcing the arriving of said crazy man. I smiled at that funny thought, and went back down the hall to get the door.

"Hey, Dad," I said.

"Hey, Bella," he said in that gruff voice of his. His eyes were a little red in the corners making it look like he might have been crying, "You ready to go?" he asked.

"Are you sure you are ready just right yet? Don't you need to rest?"

"Don't worry, I crashed last night in Casa Grande, and I lazed around this morning since it was a quick drive on Interstate-10 to here. I would like some Windex though," He added as an afterthought. "All these tiny damn dessert bugs 'been splattin up against my windshield like I'm intentionally trying to get a ticket by being blind to the world outside my car!" he exclaimed. I laughed quietly, it was funny to hear Charlie, the Forks Chief of Police, talk about getting a ticket, "So why don't you take the time to say bye to everyone, and everything; it'll probably take me at least 10 minutes to get all the critters off," he muttered the last bit, walking back to the car before turning back around to face me one more time.

"And Bells?"

"Yeah?"

"It's good to see you again," His smile turned watery, and he turned back abruptly.

"You too," I said back, but he probably couldn't hear me.

I closed the door back shut, and turned away smiling. It was a slight relief for that not to have been as awkward, as my first meetings with Charlie have been know to be, but I guess I still had thirty hours to awkward it up.

Now to do the hard part. I hated goodbyes, and I always left them 'til the last minute. It's just that they always seemed so final, and indefinite, or completely definite depending on the way you looked at it, and so... sad. I shook my head; it wasn't like that today. I was definitely coming back, but just… not for a while.

I headed first into my mother's room and sat down at her small little mahogany vanity table. It was simple, with just one curved mirror attached to a desktop—drawers on either side. On the top right corner of the table was a small, residue-like stain from when she had found out that, although nail-polish remover _was_ for removing nail polish, the surface of the removal counted… _a lot. _

_"_I mean its nail polish _remover. _If nail polish remover fails in _removing _nail polish, then I don't want to know what this world is coming to!" had been Renee's exact words. Yup that was my mother; you could see where I got my rambling habits from. I smiled as I traced the outline of the stain.

I fiddled around with some of the earrings in her ring bowl before easing the stool back and going to her closet—well, now her and Phil's closet. It made my reminiscing smile return, as I riffled through the clothes, to see that half of the ones hanging there were mine. It wasn't honestly that bad because the clothes that usually went 'missing' i.e. to Renee's closet were pieces I never wore anyway. I buried my face in the clothes, wrapped my arms around to gather them more closely, and took a deep breath through my nose. Cinnamon and orange. Sweet and spunky made for a very weird combination, but a combination that worked nonetheless. That was my mother.

I took in one more lingering breath, before closing the closet again, putting everything back in its place, and heading out to stop in at all the other rooms in the house. There really weren't many more rooms, besides the bathroom (and honestly how many memories can you have in a bathroom…?), my bedroom, the living room, and the dining room. I zipped through those, saving the kitchen and the back yard for last. Even my bedroom didn't take long. I guess it was just that I didn't have too many memories there that I wanted to keep. I even said goodbye to Bob, Phil's pet tarantula. And no, Phil was not some kind of arachno-fanatic freak. In most states you probably have a pet hamster or mouse in grade school. Well, in 3rd grade my class had a pet tarantula. We named her Rose. We fed her crickets. That's just how we did it in the desert states.

I was in the kitchen now, taking one last look, feeling my well-used kitchen utensils one last time. I looked across the room to the sliding glass door that brought you out to the back yard. I could see the beautiful purple-looking Catalina Mts. from where I stood in the kitchen. It was a beautiful day, one of the many characteristics of the late summer, with bright blue skies and picturesque cream clouds that looked like they had been painted by the angels in the dessert sky. It could be dangerous to step into that picture-perfect scene, and I knew the deception of something so magnificent: it didn't always feel the way it looked. But I usually liked the feel of the unrelenting sun beating down on my ever-pale skin. I stepped out to say my last goodbye.

I walked barefoot across the slightly cracking textured concrete, over to the oval pool, taking everything in for the last time, in at least, a couple of months. To my left was a rocky little garden with the flowers I had diligently planted and tended over the years. They continued all the way to the other side of the of the cement brick fence, and pausing at the edge of the walkway surrounding the pool. I made a quick detour over to the honeysuckle that grew naturally here, crouching down at the edge of the walkway, reaching over to pull out the flower part of the small-sized honeysuckles. Closing my teeth around the tips opposite of the petals, I sucked the tiny amount sweet nectar that came from the flowers. I took one more, closed my eyes and enjoyed, before walking back to the edge of the pool.

Once I got in a place I liked, I pulled my black capri pants to just above my knees, and dipped my toes into the pool. I put my hands behind me, leaned back into the bed of grass, and closed my eyes. I could see red through my eye lids, but it wasn't in anger; I felt perfectly at peace here.

"You really are going to miss it here, aren't you?" I jumped, startled. I turned my head, surprised, to see Renee just a couple yards away from me. I hadn't heard her slide the door open.

"Yeah, I will," I replied, nodding at her, then turning my head back around. I could hear her now as she walked toward me, and sat down next to me. She plopped down, not bothering to roll up her pants as she was wearing shorts, letting her whole calf swish in the water, her knees at the very edge of the pool. I smiled. It was so like us, her diving head-first into anything, as I shied away, carefully testing the waters to see if it was safe.

"I'll miss you too. Tucson just won't be the same with out you." Renee said sadly, even pouting a little. I shook my head, laughing lightly.

"Mom, this isn't the first time I've gone away for awhile," I said.

"I know, but you've never been away for more than a couple months on end! Usually I can deal for that long, but who knows what will happen if I'm left alone for longer than that! Maybe this time I'll accidentally set Bob free again, and without you here we won't be able to find him," she shuddered.

Yes, I, Bella Swan, was a tarantula tracker. It was definitely not the most glamorous of occupations, but it had to be done. I had never been too fond of spiders, especially the big, fuzzy, venomous kind, but after seeing what they did to my mother after getting loose, (she had been feeding it crickets, then got side-tracked and left the lid open) I decided to embrace the small part of myself that appreciated them, full-heartedly. It had been slightly unsettling, and hair-raising the first time I quested on, searching for the eight-legged creature in question, but after the first four times, I got used to it.

"Mom, don't worry, you have Phil. You'll be fine. He didn't marry you without knowing what he was getting himself into," I paused, pretending to ponder something, "In fact after 2 years of living with the Renee Monster, instead of running and screaming, he _married _you. What an odd man." I finished smiling. She swatted me on the arm, but laughed. I loved this, how Renee and I were, always so comfortable, and fun. Maybe it was strange, how I felt so comfortable with her, like she was my best friend, when she was, in fact, my mother. I guess I didn't really have any other real friends, so I didn't know what the difference was, and plus there was the fact that I acted more like the responsible one in our relationship.

"But Bella, honey," she spoke again, reaching over to take my hand in hers, "I _will _miss you so, so much; I honestly think I'll wake up one of these mornings and think '_What _am_ I doing?..'_ Without you there, but I also know that you are much too amazing of a daughter and person for me to hog all by myself, so you _go_ to Seattle and you _show_ them what you are made of! Nothing could make me more happy or proud, than see you _working it_ in Seattle, and being happy.

My mother spoke passionately, and I blushed. It always made me flush any wide range of color assortments to hear people compliment me, and so thoroughly.

"I'm only going to college for drawing and photography, Mom, _not_ going to Hollywood to become an Oscar-worthy actress." I said, trying to tone down her compliment. She was the one who shook her head this time.

"Doesn't matter _where _you are going, as long as you are going to do something you plan on succeeding in." My mother was obviously not going to give up, so I conceded in accepting her compliment.

"Thanks," I said quietly, ducking my head down, as another blush slowly engulfed my face, and I wriggled my toes that were still in the water.

"Oh, baby, I love you," Renee said, with her voice suddenly sounding emotion-wrought. I looked back up at her, and her eyes looked watery. I pulled my eyebrows together, feeling a little concerned. I thought, not for the first time, if I was really making the right choice by going to a college so far away.

I mean, surely there was one much closer to Renee and Phil that suited my needs. I could rough out all the lovey-dovey between them, couldn't I? Renee pulled her legs a little out of the pool, so only her toes were close to the water, just like me, then scooted over to me, wrapped her arms around me, and squeezed my body in a hug. Her wet cold legs brushed against mine, and I wrapped my arms around her and rested my head on shoulder. I breathed in, savoring the lovely fruity cinnamon scent firsthand.

"Nope," she said after a minute. I pulled back a little to look at her.

"What?" I asked unsure of what was going on.

"You are going to Seattle. You can't let your worries for other people, no matter how close they are, stop you from what you've been working towards, and what you want," My eyes widened. Renee had seen right through me, and read my mind. Then again she had always been very perceptive of what was going on through my head, sometimes even understanding me a little better than I did myself. Still, I could feign innocence.

"What do you mean?" I asked, my eyes still wide.

"You were considering throwing away everything, just to stay near me," she brought her hand up to my cheek, and stroked it, "You have to think of yourself sometimes. Stop being so selfless all the time! You are supposed to be the crazy teenager, not my beautiful middle-aged child," Guilt overflew me by then.

She thought I was being _selfless _by wanting to stay. She thought my going away was _brave_. I wanted to tell her that I wasn't like that. That I was just trying to run away from awkward situations that could happen, just like any coward. I wouldn't say anything though, just accept, like always, since I didn't do confrontations, well; at all, and one was sure to come if I told her how I really felt. She wouldn't listen anyway, just tell me I had it all wrong about myself. It would just be easier to tell her what she wanted to hear. _Coward_.

"Okay, sorry, I'll try," I said, as genuinely as I could, and squeezed her hand.

"That's my girl," she said and then pulled me back into a hug. We stayed like that for another moment or two, then she released me and said, "Well I guess we should be going back in. Charlie might start wondering…" I smiled and got up, giving her my hand to help her too. She took it, and then threaded her arm through mine and we walked back into the house, arms linked.

Charlie was already back in the house awkwardly trying to make small talk with Phil. When he looked up and saw me, coming toward them, he brightened up considerably.

"I already brought your bags to the car, stocked up on snacks before I came here, so if you are ready, I'm ready to go," he said.

"'Kay, just let me get my jacket and go to the bathroom," I said and hurried off.

Once I came I gave Renee and Phil two quick hugs and kisses, before following Charlie into his, unfortunately conspicuous, cruiser. As we pulled out of the long gravely driveway I turned back to 7750 N Arundel Drive, Tucson AZ, saying goodbye to the most familiar, comfortable years of my life.

.;.;.;.;.;.;.;.;.;.;.;.;.;.;.;.;.;.

My legs felt cramped. And I had to pee. Really, _really _bad. I couldn't even _think _of anything water related; just the sound of Charlie swallowing made me ache for a toilet. But I didn't want to say anything, because that would just make Charlie take the next exit to go to a rest stop, and I really didn't want to get out and relieve myself, just to get back in the space I had been starting to feel a little claustrophobic in. We were so close to home.

I knew that Forks wasn't on the way to Seattle, but when Charlie had offered to detour over to home, I had jumped at the opportunity, even though it would substantially add to the amount of time it would take to get to Seattle. But it had already been 3 in the afternoon, and once we got there at four, I would have to start lugging all my luggage in immediately. Not something I would be looking forward on any occasion, and in my current condition, I'm not so sure that it would have been beneficial to my health. And plus, I wanted to see Jacob, and I wanted to sleep in my own bed, something I found that I sorely missed after only two nights on cheap motel mattresses.

Welcome to Forks.

That was what the slightly rusting pine green sign said. Well. This was sure one heck of welcome. With a twitching left eye, an uncomfortably bloated bladder, and legs so stiff they were shaking, I entered the small town of Forks.

.;.;.;.;.;.;.;.;.;.;.;.;.;.;.

_Ahhh_. Just.. _Ahhh. _

I was in sheer heaven right now. Who knew releasing bodily fluids could be so… _heavenly. _I really wish I could have enjoyed the reminiscent ride to the house, but all I could think was, "_Just a little more… You can do it Bella! Smite those liquids that are defying gravity by not falling out right now!.." _and when we finally got to the house, I jumped out of the car, wincing, and limp-running towards the toilet. Of course I did have a couple of mishaps in the short distance to the door. Impossible to some, but for me, inevitable.

In my mad dash toward the house my right shoe came flying off, but I didn't stop until I got to the door, trying to yank it open, before realizing it was locked, and only Charlie had the key. So I rushed back over to him, and like a raving lunatic, rasped out, "Key."

He looked me up and down once, probably noting the fact that I had one shoe on and one shoe off, my hands clenched in fists around my face, hair in total disarray, and last, but not least, that crazed look in my eyes. He probably assessed that it wouldn't be the best thing to mess with me right then, and quickly handed the keys over. He was probably thinking right now that that 30 hours in an enclosed space had gone straight to my head. But I really couldn't care.

Like I said. Sheer heaven; it does that to you.

Once I finished up there, I ventured out of the bathroom, and down the stairs. Charlie had just come back in with the last of my luggage.

"You okay?" he asked tentatively, his eyebrow raised, as if bracing himself for some sort of outburst.

I blushed bright red. Now, without the blind sight of being in heaven, I knew my actions had been a little outrageous.  
"You know… when you gotta go, you gotta go…" I mumbled out, blushing again at my childish explanation for my actions. His lips twitched fighting a smile.  
"Well, as long as you are okay," he looked at the clock in the kitchen, "It's still only half past six, if you are feeling up to it, why don't you go and visit Jacob?"

I nodded, smiling. "Yeah... Yeah, I think I will. Is it okay if I go now?"

He nodded. "'Course it is." He walked over to the kitchen, and pulled out one of the top drawers. Turning around, he held up a key, "I kept that truck of yours around, for occasions like this."

My eyes widened, I hadn't even noticed if my trusty ol' Chevy was out there. I ran toward him and squeezed him.

"Thanks!" I said my voice muffled by his shirt. He awkwardly patted my back, and I quickly released him, embarrassed for my sudden show of emotion. I took the keys from his fingers.

"I'll be back by 7:30 or 8," I called over my shoulder as I headed back out the door.

* * *

**A/N: I would like to take this brief chance to celebrate the fact that this fic has gotten thirty reviews! I am estactic! …Now that may not be much compared to AMAZING stories like _Wide Awake_ or _Stitches and Scars_. But, to me, 30 reviews means 30 times my little piece moved someone out there enough to take the time to tell me! **

**Also! If you would like to see what Bella's house looks like, or the Catalina Mts. just type the address (**7750 N Arundel Drive, Tucson AZ) **into Google Maps or got to this link. (just replace the dots with actual periods.) http:/ www dot panoramio dot com/photo/7262553**

**Reviews are lovely things. **

**-pinkdogsarereminscent **


	5. O' Smirky One

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**Chapter 11:** O' Smirky One

**A/N: FINALLY THE MUCH AWAITED CHAPTER OF EDWARD AND BELLA MEETING!!.. i worked really hard to get it right, so i hope i will have satifisfied you all! i am so happy i am FINALLY getting toward writing what in the actual description of the summary!!**

**NOTE: i was rereading/editing all of my chapters, and i haven't gotten around to reposting them yet, but i have found ONE horrible typo!! EDWARD does NOT become a player UNTIL he starts high school! in middle school he's still obsessed with music and being isolated!! I REPEAT EDWARD+HIGH SCHOOL=PLAYER!**

**...well? what are you doing there? READ!!**

**-pdah**

* * *

"…And then Seth said, 'Hey! I can't help it if I enjoy the feeling of the sun shining on the places the sun don't shine!..'"

I burst out laughing, and Jacob joined me. He was telling me about funny things that had happened around La Push since I had been here last. The particular story he was telling me now, was about when they had caught Seth running around naked in one of the clearings in the forest.

"God, I missed you guys…" I got out, once our laughter had settled down, a little.  

"Bells, I missed you too," he said as he easily slung his arm around my shoulders since we were sitting, "So what's new with you?

"Not much really," I said. After thinking for a moment, I decided that wasn't really a fair answer. "Well, Renee got married to Phil, a couple of months back. And I'm going to college. That's new," I offered.

"It's great that you're going somewhere so close to here. Now you have no excuse not to visit your good buddy, ol' pal Jacob," said he, a smile in his voice.

"I still can't believe it though. I'm going tomorrow. College. Adulthood. _Scary_," I said, biting my lip.

"Well you know Bella, you could always stay with me here in La Push, and we could live a long, childish life of sheer happiness and love…" he said suggestively.

My breath stopped, just for a quick moment because after a long trip I was definitely not ready statements like that, "Jacob, don't…" I shut my eyes tight, then opened them and breathed out. "You _know_ it can't be like that," I continued, in a voice much smaller.

"I know, I know, just playing with you," he said softly, as he mussed up my hair. I really felt bad whenever he mentioned things like that, because I always had to shoot them down, making sure he knew that I hadn't changed.

Two summers ago, I had decided to come to Forks to enjoy the company of my best friend, instead of the company of the sun. One week into my stay, he'd told me how he felt. I'd been shocked to say the least—never having seen that one coming—since I had only ever thought of him as a friend, a brother. But he'd looked so hopeful when he told me, how could I have shot down something that would make him so happy?

So I tried. We tried, really.

I told him from the beginning that I didn't feel that same, but that I was willing to try make my feelings into something more. He'd always listened to me moan and groan about every infinitesimal thing, made me happy when I was sad, and when I was happy, been happy with me. It was so easy being with him that I thought… maybe it could work.

But that easiness had started to fade away as then weeks went on, myself trying desperately to feel the same way he felt for me. It had started to fade away long before I let him kiss me, everything wanting so badly to feel that spark. It was all but gone, before Jake pulled away. I guess he saw where this was going. Unrepairable.

"It's okay," he'd breathed, inches away from my face. I had opened my eyes, confused, and wary. I had been preparing to enjoy his kiss as much as I could.

"Huh?.." had been my intelligent reply.

He had smiled sadly. "You have to make such an effort – It's like you have to concentrate on not being disgusted. It's not supposed to be like that. And I can see you've really tried to make this work. But it isn't. Even as lovesick as I am, I can see that. So, thanks for trying." His face had slightly crumpled and a slightly dejected expression had filled it. I'd felt horrible that I had put it there.

"What does this mean?" I'd asked quietly, afraid of the answer. "We can't be friends at all anymore?"

"Of course not!" he'd exclaimed. "We're not going to let a little disagreement of feelings, ruin our friendship! … As long as you still want a friendship with me," he had added, unsure. I had nodded my head vehemently, and thrown my arms around his waist.  

The tears came by themselves then. I don't know why. I guess it was because it was Jacob. It was the guy who was everything I had ever needed, and I couldn't give him the one thing that would trump all others. I couldn't give him what would repay for everything he had ever given me: his laughter, his joy, his sympathy, his carefree attitude, his way of bringing out the best in me. So I gave him the next best thing.

My tears.

And he'd rubbed my back all the while, as I thoroughly ruined his shirt, once again comforting me when it was all my fault.

After that, we were back to being normal—good friends, just like riding a bike. But every now and again, he brought up the uncomfortable subject, even if it was just jokingly.

"So how was the trip up here?" he asked, bringing me back from my thoughts, "30 hours trapped in a car with Charlie is bound to be _fun._"

"_'Fun'_ isn't exactly the word that comes to mind. More like 'tiring', or 'trying', or 'anxious'… Well, it wasn't _all_ bad. The first day on the road was actually kind of nice. Watching the scenery change from dessert to beach to green was really interesting, since I usually just fly up. And I had my iPod and books to keep me company, since we all know Charlie isn't much of a talker…" I trailed off thinking.

"But then on the second and third days, my legs started to get really cramped, and my iPod just wasn't doing the trick, and my books were great, as always, but you know me, how I can't read or look downwards on a moving vehicles for long without getting sick, and my back was really starting to hurt from the lumpy mattresses!" I could tell I was ranting, but Jake was laughing by now, and it felt good to make him happy, so I kept on with the trials and tribulations of my trip up here.

"I felt like I had to go to the bathroom more and more often, which was kind of scary, and nerve-wracking when I had to mumble out 'I have to go..', since Charlie was being so dead set against stopping! I mean it was like he was trying to get there in one sitting,.. -er driving?" I paused, unsure, before continuing faster, "Which would have been great except for the fact that I couldn't sit in the car for 32 hours straight!" I finished off, huffing out, then taking a deep breath in. He was curling up from laughter, and there were tears forming in his eyes.

"I t-think," he sputtered out, still not being able to control his laughter. "I think, it's good that you got this w-weight off your chest…" He nodded once, as if confirming his opinion, all the while fighting the laughter that was dying to continue, making his mouth twitch and turn into odd, and seemingly uncomfortable shapes, "It must be hard, carrying all of that burden around on your shoulders,"

He paused, placing his lips into a solemn line, before breaking out into a wide grin, "Ever think of seeing a psychiatrist?" He broke out in laughter again. I swatted his arm, but joined him in his laughter.

We were still laughing when there was a knock on the shed door, and Jacob guffawed out, "Come in,"

"Jake, my mom just made some cookies and thought she'd bri-" She stopped when she saw me. I didn't. But then I had already stiffened when I heard the remains of her formerly melodic voice.

"Oh. Hello, Bella," she said stiffly, the rest of her lilting voice fading out completely, "What are you doing here?" she asked not impolitely. I never knew what made her change her attitude toward me so severely. It was as if I could feel the animosity coming off of her in waves. We had been fine until last winter: not friends, but certainly not enemies. I lifted my head to answer her assertively, but my confidence wavered a little when I saw the cold glare she hadaimed at me.

"Well, I was on my way to Seattle-" I began quietly, but she interrupted.

"Forks isn't on the way to Seattle if you are coming from Arizona," she snapped, "In fact its two hours _out _of the way." She raised an eyebrow as if challenging me.

"I just missed home and wanted to come by before heading off to college," I got out meekly, looking down immediately whenever I met her hostile eyes.

"Home. Right." She nodded once, as if getting it, but I could hear the sarcasm behind her tone. She opened her mouth to say more, but Jacob stopped her.  

"Leah. Enough. I'll be right in to devour those lovely cookies your mom made, so you'd better hurry back in if you plan on having more than a crumb," he said good-naturedly, trying to break the tension between us.

Her eyes flicked to him, listening with vague disinterest, then she glared once more at me, before turning to leave.

"Sorry about that," Jake said once she had left.

"Don't worry, it's not your fault," I said, smiling to reassure him, "But why does she act like that toward me?"

He looked at me with a little worried expression, while concentrating on something. "She, well, see…" He paused for a moment biting his lip, before seemingly deciding on something. "She's _Leah. _She literally defies broad definition. And we all have our problems, right?"

His answer didn't make any sense at all, and by no means answered my question, but his eyes had turned so pleading, that I could help but nod along. I got to my feet, offering him my brightest smile.

"Well, I guess I should go now; wouldn't want to keep you from you cookies," I said with a smile.

"Oh, no, anything but that!" he joked melodramatically, "But remember to come down anytime. We're only hours apart now, so don't be a stranger," he said more seriously, as he got up from where we had been sitting.

"I won't." I replied honestly.

He grinned, and we walked out of the shed together. Once we reached the point we had to separate, he pulled me into a tight, warm hug. I buried my head into his chest, and breathed in his fresh, but woodsy scent. I hugged him back tightly before letting go.

"Bye, Bells. Seen you soon," He was still grinning as he continued, "Don't do anything I wouldn't do."

I snorted. "Knowing you, that really doesn't leave much limitation," I shook my head, laughing lightly. "Bye, Jake," I finished as I started to walk away, back to my truck

-------------------

"So are you excited?" Charlie asked the next morning, trying to break the silence, not an uncomfortable one, as we were driving up to Seattle.

"Yeah, I am. But also kind of scared," I said, biting my lip.

"Well, don't worry. You are a smart, beautiful girl, and I'm sure you will do great," he said gruffly, barely getting out the last word.

"Um, thanks," I said awkwardly. Charlie and I had never been too good with sentimental conversations.

After that we rode in silence, but I didn't mind; neither did Charlie. I had my iPod, my camera, and well-rested legs and back. I was good. I occasionally tried to take some pictures, but the car was rattling around too much to take a still shot, so, mostly, I settled on trying to memorize the way there, so I would know how to get back.

Three hours later we were driving through the streets of Seattle. It was a lot different than Forks, but a little the same. While it was definitely a city, there was still that northwest feel to it. Soon we were pulling up close to the dormitory.

Charlie cut the engine, and got out to get the bags out of the trunk. I closed my eyes and took deep breath, before joining him. I had brought more than I would have anywhere, but I was an art student, which required supplies and space, and it wasn't the desert; jackets and boots would be required which was why I had one suitcase solely of jackets and shoes, and one of my camera, and drawing/art stuff, along with one of clothes, and one with books and accessories.

Five suitcases was all I had, but it took us a half an hour to get all my bags up because, of course, I had the room on the top floor. To most, six flights of stairs aren't bad, for me they were _disastrous_. Charlie had gotten two up to my room by the time I had reached my room for one.  

I was huffing and puffing, and it would be just my luck to blow the house down, but, luckily, I didn't by the time we finished.

"Um," I said, unsure how to proceed in saying goodbye.

"You all set?" said Charlie, "Do you need help with anything else?"

I smiled, and shook my head.

"Well, I guess this is it," he took one step toward me, and I followed suit. When he hesitantly opened his arms, I took the invitation quickly.

"Come home, and visit me anytime, okay, Bells?" he said in a husky tone.

I nodded into his chest. "I'll miss you, Dad," I mumbled into his shirt. I sniffed.

"Me too," he said in that gravelly voice of his, and could feel my eyes starting to water. I let go and took a step back to look around.

This unfamiliar room would be my life for the next 4 years. Once Charlie walked back out through that door, I would really be alone. I breathed out sharply. I could feel Charlie watching me, and there was no point in worrying him further. I could do this. I knew it.

"Bye, Dad," I looked back him with a smile. I would see him soon.

"Bye Bella," he said back, and we walked to the door together. I watched him walk down the hallway, and disappear around the corner that led down the stairs. I turned back to my room. To my immediate right, was a decent sized wardrobe, and to my left, at the end of the short hallway that led out to a small living area, complete with a desk, a closet and two beds, was a door. I walked down to it to see if it led where I thought it did.

Yup, the bathroom.

In front of the door, was the bathtub lined against the wall to my right, and the toilet was right next to it, with the sink and counter being to the right of the toilet. The water heater was also in here.

Good to know.

I walked back out and went over towards the beds. I sat on the one with a window beside it. It was kind of lumpy. I guess I was in for some more quasi-motel mattress sleeping. Fun.

If I looked ahead of me, I could see the kitchen. It wasn't particularly big, but it wasn't too small either. Though my view was partially obscured by the plastic 'dinner' table. I looked around once more. My eyes settled on my bags. I guess I should unpack.

I hung up the clothes, and jackets, and shoes first. Those didn't take up much room, so I didn't have to worry about upsetting my unknown roomie by hogging up space. Everything else was a little more tricky, as I didn't know what kind of stuff she would have, so I decided to just unpack a couple of books and put them on the nightstand by the bed furthest away from the window, and have my camera ready at the top of my suitcase.

Once I finished all that, I went over and opened the solitary window; it was getting a little stuffy in here. There was a small moving van out there. How much stuff can you bring to college? It wasn't as if you were moving into an unfurnished mansion. I shook my head in disbelief, and moved to go to the bathroom.

But before I could quite make it, a small girl bounded in seemingly as light as a feather. She was very short, couldn't be any taller than 5 feet, with short spiky black hair. That was all I caught of her appearance, though, because she zipped right past me, after opening and closing the closet, going into the bathroom, then back out again to the living area. I had opened my mouth to introduce myself, but by then she was already in the kitchen, and I could hear her testing out the gas stove.

I blinked.

She was soon out of the kitchen and coming around towards the doorway, when she stopped in her tracks as she saw me. "Oh! Were you here the whole time?" she asked, her voice high-pitched, but musical, like bells.

I nodded slowly once, and her shockingly bright blue sapphire eyes widened.

"I'm so sorry, I swear I wasn't ignoring you," she shook her, then blushed slightly, coloring that same paleness that I had, but somehow looked beautiful on her, "I tend to get …_focused, _when I'm on a mission," she laughed, it a tinkling sound.

"Don't worry, I'm used to being ignored," I said with a shrug, "May I ask what you were doing?"

"I was just checking the lay of the land," she gestured with her hand, "you know, so I know where to put everything."

I actually really didn't, but hey, that was probably one of the many differences between me, and her.

"Uh-huh. So that's why you don't have anything with you yet,"I mused. 

"Yup, they're all waiting to be royally brought up to their new home," she said happily, and it made me smile. Something about her bubbly exterior reminded me of Elle Woods from Legally Blond, talking about her possessions as people, but nothing about her character was ditzy, or stupid. She was just, happy.

"I don't think I've introduced myself," she said, noting my smile, as she approached me confidently. "Hi, my name is Alice Cullen." She smiled herself, while sticking her hand out politely.

I took her hand, pondering. "Cullen?.. that name sounds familiar.."

She shrugged.

"Oh, I'm Isabella Swan," I said quickly, shaking myself, to clear my head. "Bella, actually. 'Isabella' just comes out as a natural reflex," I paused thinking, "Well, correcting it to 'Bella' also is too-," I stopped abruptly and blushed; I was rambling. I looked back at her, but she didn't seem to notice, actually, she looked just as in thought as I had been.

"That's interesting. I actually knew a 'Swan' where I used to live. Chief Swan, to be exact," she informed me brightly. My jaw dropped.

"_Where _did you say you lived again?" I asked, my eyes still wide. She flippantly waved her hand as she answered.

"Forks,.. Washington, you probably don't know it," She continued, taking my dumbfounded expression directed toward the name of the town, "I know, _Forks, _who came up with that idea? I mean, 'Spatula' would have been at least funner to say!" she smiled at me again, laughing.

"Sorry," I said shaking my head once again, "Yeah, I know Forks,.. it's where my dad lives." I shrugged again.

This time it was her time to be surprised. "Well, I'll be! Little Miss Chief Charlie's Swan daughter, right here! It truly is a small world, isn't it?" After a pause she asked me, "Do ever come down often?"

"Um, yeah for holidays. I live mostly with Renee—my mom—and her new husband in Tucson," I said somewhat vaguely. I really didn't want to get too into the subject. Thinking about it so soon in my unsure arrival here was not a good idea, and was a slightly uncomfortable subject to talk about to people close to me, let alone to some I had only known a few minutes.

"Do you like Tucson?" she continued asking.

"Yeah, I love Tucson," I answered genuinely, "I love _everything_ about it,"

"Pretty big change of scenery," she noted.

"Yeah…" I furrowed my eyebrows. "Even after all this time, I'm still not sure if I quite like it," I said with a small grin. She cocked her head to the side.

"Then why did you move here?"

I stiffened. Only a little though. I just didn't really want to talk about it right now.  

"It's complicated." I said, looking down. She nodded, and, thankfully, left it at that.

"So. My brother's helping me unload the van. He'll be here soon; I hope you don't mind," Her voice like wind chimes filled the air once again.

"Oh, no, that's fine," I smiled reassuringly, then backtracked over what she had just said, "-Wait, that's _your _moving van out there? How much stuff did you bring?" I asked, truly baffled. How could someone, especially of such small size, bring so much?

"Only the basics," she answered to my very disbelief. Before I could reply, not that I would have, there was a knock on the door.

"I bet that's him," She said to me, then called toward the door, "Come in!"

Before the knocker had even walked two steps in, Alice had attacked him around the waist. He looked down, to the small, fierce girl that was attached around him. I watched their reunion from the end of the hallway.

"Edward! I missed you!" said Alice, her voice a little muffled by his shirt. He smiled, and began tenderly stroking her hair.

"I missed you too, pixie," he said softly. I melted a little on the inside. His voice was like honey and velvet, and combination that I would have never thought of on my own, but perfect in this situation. It sounded so sweet, and laced with love, I couldn't help but break out into a smile too.   

He was, in a word, beautiful. I felt my fingers instinctively twitch toward my camera, them unwilling to let such beauty pass me by. But what would he think if I whipped it out and started taking pictures like a crazed paparazzi person? I contented myself by simply studying his pale face. His head was tilted down, so I could only see parts of it. His perfectly straight nose and sensuous mouth contributed to the stark beauty of his face, but his eyes… and the long lashes that hid his eyes from view added to his mystique. They weren't luscious and pouty like typical photo beauty, but something about the slightly less than fullness of them curling into a small smile was undeniably sexy, and his hair.

His hair. Breathtaking.  

It was the color of the desert sands as it rained, flecked with bronze and gold, and even a little ruby, that glinted in even the subtlest rays of sunlight. It was the personification of beautiful confusion, sticking up and out in the most inconceivable directions possible. Whether it was to smooth it down, or mess it up more, I didn't know, but I was feeling this nearly irresistible urge to run my fingers through his hair. He looked at me then, his love for Alice still passionately written in his eyes. I looked down quickly, before he could captivate me further. I felt that familiar redness spread across my cheeks, embarrassed to be caught staring at him so blatantly.  But my, my, his _eyes._

Just one look and I was a goner.

Green. Emerald. Forest. Myrtle. Viridescent. No color seemed to do the striking, the potent quality of them quite justice. And the look behind his eyes. It should be a crime to be so beautiful, and also have such _feeling_ behind it all too. Then he coughed, making me glance back up at the maker of the sound. His lips. His bewitching, wearing-the-sexiest-smirk-imaginable, perfect-in-their-inperfection lips.   

Then I recognized it. The smirk.   

It was a very familiar smirk. It was the smirk of players everywhere. It was the smirk that said "I know I'm attractive and charming, and I always get what I want, so don't even bother trying to fight it."

And it was aimed at me. Figures.

They always thought the quiet ones were easy. I sighed internally. There goes the picture-perfect man of the century. Why did all the gorgeous men have to be gay, married, or manwhores?

By then, Alice had sprung back into action, catching my attention, saying, "Oh! I haven't introduced you two yet! Sorry!"

"Don't be," I muttered, too low for them to hear. Her brother's eyes widened slightly. _Oops_. Maybe they could hear. I quickly looked over to Alice to see if I had insulted her. But she looked perfectly fine, so maybe it was just that her brother had good hearing.

"This is my brother," said Alice gesturing to said brother.

I nodded, acknowledging that I had heard her.

"Hello, I'm Edward Cullen," said Edward politely. His voice was different this time, but I still melted, against my will. It was low, and smooth, and seductive, but somehow perfectly articulate and formal. With a voice like that he could have melted the resident ice queen of Antarctica into a puddle of smitten. Well, I guess it was time to carry a portable freezer around; I did not need any meltage going on around me.

But, I suppose, if he was going to start out being polite, I could do the same. I walked over as confidently as I could, keeping my eyes glued to the ground, watching for any unsuspecting culprits of my unpredictable falls. Once their feet were in my line of sight, I stopped.

"Nice to meet you," I started, lifting my eyes to travel up his body, his _lean, lanky and muscul- Stop! _, "My name is…" I trailed off, lost. My eyes had reached his once again. Big mistake. I could feel that blush crawling up my neck to my cheeks, but I couldn't look away, or say, or think anything nearly relevant. How was I supposed to remember anything under that intense gaze? I couldn't have even remembered my name if wanted to… which I did… since I was _introducing _myself.

Great.

"You name is…?" Edward prodded, and I averted my eyes down to his mouth, anything to break the stupid trance I was in. The darn _smirk_ was back, full on. He thought I was fumbling about over _him_… which I was… but he didn't need to know that! 

"Bella," I snapped. His smirk turned.. smirkier, and it annoyed me. A lot.

"It suits you," said he, O' Smirky One. I fought the urge to roll my eyes. Couldn't they ever be more creative than going on about my unforetold 'beauty'.

"Yeah, just about as much as 'Bella' suits you," I said sarcastically.

He looked amused. Alice's eyes were flitting back and forth between us, trying to figure out what was going on.

"Well. I think it's time to get the bags!" Alice said brightly, cutting through the, well, whatever was going on between us.

Edward turned back slightly to her. "Does this mean I get to keep Miss Bella's company alone?" said Edward in that annoyingly alluring voice.

Alice's eyes widened.

"No!.. I mean, _no_, _you _are the one who is getting the bags. Such a task wouldn't be fit for a lady!" She sniffed as if offended by such a thought, before her face turned back to being playful, "So get on with it! Jazzie's already down there unloading," he tensed for some reason at that statement, "so it's just your job to bring them up,"

Edward turned back to me."Well Miss Bella," He said as he took as step toward me, "I am very pleased to have made your acquaintance."

With that he took my hand, and lowered his godly head, and slowly, gently, pressed his fair lips to the back of my hand. He stood back up abruptly then, and walked right out without another word. Alice stared after him for a moment, but then quickly followed him out.

I shivered. _What just happened_?

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**A/N: well?.. what did you think? do you think i describe the essence of edward well enough? would you like to see edward's pov of the MEETING? or do you think this chapter is just TOTAL FAIL. tell me what you think! better yet REVIEW what you think! and remember, i do not discourage flames, as long as you tell me WHY you so DEEPLY hate what i write. YAY FOR FLAMES... *coughs***

**pdaN-W (any guesses for what n-w means?)**

**i posted a drawing of the layout in A and B's dorm room on DeviantART, so here's the link:**

**http:// pinkdogsarehappy dot deviantart dot com /art/POH-Dorm-118635173**

**just take out all the 'dot's and spaces and put in actual periods:)**


	6. Edward AFTER

**Chapter 10: Edward AFTER**

**A/N: To those of you who haven't seen it yet, I posted a drawing of Alice and Bella's dorm room :) **

http:/pinkdogsarehappy DOT deviantart DOT com/art/POH-Dorm-118635173 _just replace the 'dot's with periods. _

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**Edward.**

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As I headed down to see Alice, I wondered how our first meeting since... since a lot had happened. Lord knows my confrontation with Jasper hadn't gone too well.

_That _day, after my little ride, I had stormed into the into the frat house, in search of one person. I had found him in the common room. Jasper had looked up with a worried expression on his face and said,

"Edward, are you o—" I had ignored him, and went and stood in front of the couch James was dozing on.

"James." I had nudged him with my foot. He had slowly opened his eyes, and nodded to me. Out of my peripheral vision I could see Jasper's eyebrows furrowing in confusion.

"It's on." He had looked confused, not sure whether to expect a fight, so I let my eyes wander to the whiteboard behind the couch. His eyebrows raised, as a sly, lazy smirk crawled up his face, a smirk that mirrored mine. He brought out his hand for me to take. I could see Jasper taking this in with a look of dawning horror, but had ignored it once again, and took James' hand, as he pulled me in, pounding me on the back with the other.

"Good to have to back man,"

"Amen to that," he had smirked once again, and I had turned, unintentionally fully facing Jasper now. I had nodded to him, and gone back up the stairs.

A little while later had come a knock on my door.

"Come in," the door had opened and closed, and the person had taken a seat on the chair by my desk. I had looked up from my book and said, "Hey Jazz, what's up?"

"'_What's up_?' How can you be so calm after what's happened?"

"What happened?" He had stared at me in disbelief.

"You. And Angela," I had still been staring blankly at him, but it was harder when he said _that _name, "You guys broke up."

"And _who _did you hear this information from," I had asked disinterestedly. He kept on staring at me like I had just morphed into some other species.

"Alice," he said.

"And did Alice tell you how Angela _used _me? Strung me along, then dropped me cold?"

"Edward. Get a grip. She didn't do that."

"Says _who?_" I asked pointedly.

"Says Ali—" I'd cut him off, "Says _Angela,_"

"Edward, you _know _Angela, you've _known _her for the past six years, you _know _she would never do something like that."

"Have you ever been her boyfriend?" I had answered for him, "No, you haven't. You don't know the _vile, repulsive _things she is capable of," His eyes had bulged out in incredulous amazement.

"Vile? _Repulsive?_" He had shaken his head; "Tell me then, other than this claimed _injustice_, what wrong has she ever done to you?" I had known I wouldn't be able think of anything else; Angela was just that good.

"Angela was a piece of work. _You_ can't even _see _it. All you do is blindly trust that she is there, working for you on the inside, when all the while, yeah, she _is_ working from the inside, working to bring you down, humiliate you,"

"She did _none _of that. I went over there today, because Alice said to go check on her, and when I got there, she doing her best, just sitting there silent, but every now and then a tear would slide down her face. She was _hurting _Edward, and it was all because of you!"

"My god, Jasper, I can't believe this! She's already got you wrapped around her finger too! That's what she _wants _you to think! She doesn't want to have to lose any more people to her cause than possible!"

"Edward, you need to _grow the fuck up_. Stop making Angela seem like the devil because of a mistake _you _made." I had just gaped at him.

"Edward?" he asked in the quiet, a couple moments later, "_Why_ did you say it's back on to James? You aren't really reverting to our primitive ways are you?" I had looked up at him, straight in the eyes.

"Yes, yes I am. But I wouldn't call it reverting. I'd call it survival," he had stared at me again, that crazy stare that was becoming all too familiar. So I continued, "Survival because… there is no fucking way I'm going to come out of this alive, if I don't start being strong again. I was so… _weak… _with … _Her,_ and so truly disgusting… letting her walk all over me," I shook my head.

"You weren't disgusting! You loved—"

"Don't even _dare _start on the '_love,_' aspect of any—"

"_James _would be the disgusting one, what he was, _and still is_ doing to all those women, is wrong. And once you stopped doing the same, you hated it, yourself…the way you just had used women, completely disregarding any feelings they might have—"

"But they don't have feelings! They're fucking tools! They don't care about you, all they want is entertainment for themselves!"

"So…what you are saying is…" he had said each word slowly, calculated, "You are stooping down to the level that you think they are?"

"_No_, I'm giving them a taste of their own medicine."

"And you _really_ think this?" His eyes had probed mine, and I stared back, defiantly, challenging him to say more.

"Your mother would be disgusted," he had finally spat out.

"My mother is dead."

He had looked incredulously shocked, then his face turned back into abhorrence as he walked from the room. I guess I was a little surprised too. I had never referred to Elizabeth Masen as anything but the woman who gave birth to me, and Esme, in all respects and purposes, was my mother. I had just been a little shaken up that day. It'd go away soon.

I also couldn't decide if I was still mad at Alice for making Angela seem like a saint. I knocked on her door now, and just hearing her beautiful voice call me in, I knew my decision had been made for me. You just can't stay mad at the ones you love.

I opened the door, walked in, and braced myself for the impact.

_Oof._

I looked down, and there she was, my beautiful baby sister. Her face was buried deep in my gray sweater, so I brought my hands to her hair, stroking her hair, that same hair she had dyed blonde the last time I saw her, then deemed it, "atrocious", and demanded me to cut it all off, once it was of cutting length. I still didn't know why she had asked _me _to do it instead of a hairdresser, but that was, _Alice_.

She said she missed me, and while I didn't how exactly true this was, I knew I had most definitely missed her, my spunky little pixie, and told her so. In the midst of this nostalgic reunionthough, I sensed we were not alone, and one quick look away from my Alice, confirmed that yes, it was a lady, and yes, she was studying me, quite scrupulously, from what I could tell. And my, this lady could _blush. _

A smirk began to crawl back up my face, but then, that wasn't too surprising; it never left my face that often these days. As Alice released me, I took _her_ profuse blushing time to appraise her instead. Brown hair. Brown Eyes. Medium height. So _plain.. _but she was skinny enough, with a nice figure. Pale skinned, that was surprising, it seemed that tan—sun tan, spray tan, tanning booth tan, naturally tan—was all the craze nowadays. And shy seeming. Well, that was always fun. I weighed my options, but it would all depend on how much Alice liked her. Nevertheless, I coughed to get her attention, even though I would doubt even that much was really necessary. It was conceited, yes, but they just couldn't keep their eyes away from me for too long.

Her eyes flicked back up, as expected, and her eyes closed in on my mouth. My smirk grew wider, but then almost faltered, as her eyes… _narrowed_, instead of going wide. Her brows, surprisingly unplucked, were continually pulling slightly together and back, as in concentration. Then everything relaxed. But she looked disappointed? I was confused… And feeling a little unnerved, as she stared right back at me, this time seemingly staring straight through me.

This was, unusually, missed by Alice, as she jumped, and brought both hands to her cheeks, in a look of surprise said, "Oh! I haven't introduced you two yet! Sorry!" I was still focused on her roomie though, and noticed as her mouth formed some words, almost too low to hear, 'd..t be'?.. '_Don't be'_? What was _wrong _with this girl? That was the first time I'd ever heard _that _come out of the opposite sex's mouth when being introduced to me.

"This is my brother," said Alice, and _she_ nodded disinterestedly in my direction, but looking vaguely at something to her left —a bed? It was time to turn the tables, fix this… strange situation.

"Hello, I'm Edward Cullen," I put on my best voice for winning-over occasions, and saw her jaw tighten a little. Good, she was fighting it. She seemed to consider something, then nod, almost imperceptibly, and to herself, and began to walk over. I couldn't understand what kind of message she was trying to send with her strong strides over, but never once looking up, her head meekly tilted downwards... There were coy ways to send mixed signals, but this, I would have to say, was not one of them... She stopped once she was a couple feet away, right in front of me.

"Nice to meet you," her voice strong, but volume seemed like it was trying to burst from the quieter tones she spoke in,and her head finally started to rise. I was… weirdly, almost in anticipation of seeing her face close up. But not so much that I didn't notice how slowly her eyes were traveling up my body.

"My name is…" She started, at around my chin level, but her eyes finally met mine and I …

And I would have probably done a mental victory dance with her trailing off, … but, regretfully I had just done the same…her _eyes_.. were.. so.. _deep_.. chocolate –Just pretty. That's all. J-just prettier than I would have expected looking how dumpy she did. Who did she think she was, underplaying everything else about her self, completely unpreparing the unsuspecting for the depth of her eyes!

I reminded myself it was _her _lost in _my _eyes, not the other way around. And blushing. And paralyzed-looking at the moment. And seeming to only be capable of blinking at the moment. And still lost in _my _eyes. Hah! Well, I would have said well, bravo Miss, for lasting so long against me. I would have said, but, the thing is, Miss, no one _ever_ wins against me…(except Alice..) But it was time to claim my prize, and on my well-deserved smirk-placed face, prodded, as innocently as a snake, "Your name is . . .?"

"Bella." _Oh_? What was this? Opposition, even after defeat? Does this, Miss Bella, handle _defeat_ unwell? I wanted to tell her using those snappy tones could be a _dangerous_ thing in the hands of an inexperienced user. Instead, I decided to humor her, and maybe help her along.

"It suits you," although, really, I would have to say it was nothing of the sort. She rolled her eyes. Ah, I saw she wasn't going to let me be gentlemen and make this easier for her.

"Yeah," she snapped again, "Just as much as Bella suits you," now, that... could be considered insulting.. but rather, I would think of her as feisty. I liked feisty. It was always entertaining to see someone try keeping their cool, when really, they were dead in the water. Still, I was interested to see how long she would try.

Alice _had _been noticing all of this of course, (I was starting to worry about her) and interrupted, "Well."—Now, I was wary. Did this short syllable reply mean what I thought it did? —"I think it's time to get the bags!" She finished brightly. That meant there was still hope… and turning back to Alice, I asked, "Does this mean I get to keep Miss Bella's company alone?"

Her eyes widened, for a half-a-second she couldn't control, and burst out with a "No!" and my spirits collapsed. All that hard work for nothing. _Nothing. _Alice _liked _this Bella. This Bella, with her bad clothes, or rather, _unstylish _clothes, which I had come to know with Alice was a _capital crime._ This girl, with her plain attire, plain hair, plain disposition… how could this _be_?

Well, there was time yet; Alice _did _have the rest of the year, although the next couple of days would probably be enough for Alice to decide on her ultimate …indifference on the subject of this Bella. So caught up was I in my disappointment, that I only heard the last bit of what Alice was saying, and that was only because of a certain person's name that was sure to make spirits my sink lower "—azzie's already down there unloading, so it's just your job to bring them up," came up.

Great. _Fun_. Did this mean that _I _would have to be the one to tell my baby sister about my and Jasper's falling out? I hadn't talked to him at all in the past couple days, our only contact when we would brush past each in the frat house when it was crowded. I couldn't really see what his problem was. _He _was the one believing the lie.

But, I couldn't afford to lose face in front of this Bella, definitely not now, when I was so close, so I turned back to her and said, charm turned up,

"Well Miss Bella," I took a step forward in acknowledgment, smoothly bringing myself that much closer to her, "I am very pleased to have made your acquaintance."

I was close enough, so I took the hand of her left arm that was hanging straight by her side, as her right hand was locked tightly around above her elbow, attached to the arm crossed below her chest, and might have taken more than a suave lifting-of-hand to get it loose.

I tilted my head down, and could feel her wary eyes, burn shocked into the back of my head, as I lowered it down, towards her—actually, quite.. soft, and peaches 'n' cream—hand.

The second my lips touched her hand, my mind was a mile a minute, lacing all the profane language I knew, in a never-ending, never stopping swear. The only thing I could coherently think was:

What. The hell. Was this.

The image of _fireworks _kept on coming to my head, and then I knew I had to get _out _of here. Suddenly, Alice robbing me of my prize, and replacing it with handiwork, even with Jasper didn't seem too bad.

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**Reviews are always appreciated. Just like a Confusedward is an Amusingward. (I am aware that that.. doesn't really work. bare with me :)**

**pinkdogsarewitty... not...**

**(Oh, and I have to say though, this same exact scene through both POV's isn't going to be a regular thing or habit. So either worry it, or expect it not. This particular one is just crucial from both points :) **


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